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Published by What is Life Podcast
What Is Life? is a podcast about asking the questions none of us really have the answers to. Tiff + Cody explore love, friendship, belief, marriage, parenting, sex, money, identity, spirituality and everything in between with curiosity, honesty, and a willingness to admit when we have absolutely no idea. This isn’t a podcast about having life figured out. It’s about questioning what we thought we knew, sharing what we’ve learned along the way, and figuring it out together. Real, raw, vulnerable, and hopefully really effing fun. We don’t know either. Let’s talk about it. 🎙️
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We went back and forth on the title for this one. Are soulmates real? Do you pick yours? What if you find them and it still doesn't work? We're coming up on 11 years, and we got married at 19 and 20, which is insane to say out loud now. So on this one we get into how we actually met (it's a weird one, we'd never met in person), who we each were back then, and how different those two people are from the ones sitting here. We talk about the codependent years and how we got out of them, what it looks like to be two whole people choosing each other instead of two people who need each other, and a conversation about friends of ours who chose honestly and ended up somewhere else entirely. Where we landed: we think we're soulmates and we think it's a choice every single day. Both can be true, and honestly the second part is the more beautiful one. Our question for you: have you learned to love the person your partner is becoming, or are you still holding on to who they used to be? And are you willing to actually show them who you are, or are you still showing them who you think they want?
This is the one we were both nervous to record. We grew up Mormon in Utah County. We loved it. And then, separately and at totally different speeds, it stopped holding. On this one we tell you what that was actually like. What breaks first, what it costs you, what it does to a marriage when one of you is unraveling and the other one has no idea. And what you tell your kids about right and wrong when the whole framework is gone. We're not here to talk anyone out of anything. This is just our story, told honestly, and it took us a long time to be able to tell it out loud. Our question for you: have you ever stopped and asked what do I actually believe, versus what do I believe just because it's what I was taught?
Genuinely asking. We could use all the advice we can get. We moved to Maui and realized we haven't made a friend from scratch in about fifteen years. Back in Utah we had three or four couples on our street. Kids go down, walk over, play games, hot tub, go home. Here we wave at cars and feel lucky to get a nod back. The first month was fun. Then it got real. Cody hit a point of telling Tiff he didn't know how long he could last here if he kept feeling this lonely. Men don't plan things. Men don't invite. And putting yourself out there as a guy is weirdly vulnerable. It took one text in Tiff's girls group chat to get him around a campfire with four other dads, which says a lot. We also got into something we didn't see coming: people here hold back until they know you're actually going to stay. And the thing religion honestly got right, which is that when you move, community just comes with it. Take that away and you're starting over at 30 with no Sunday. Then we play red flag, green flag on friendship. Fifteen best friends. Never initiating but always saying yes. Someone with no close friends at all. Our question for you: if you're craving deeper friendships, what's stopping you from going first? Also if you live on Maui, call us. We're not joking.
Nobody wakes up one morning and decides to detonate their life. It happens inch by inch. A question you can't unask. A moment where you realize you've been outsourcing how you're supposed to live to your church, your parents, your friends, the town you never left. For us it was a conversation about club soccer. Our friends asked if we were signing our 7 year old up, because if we didn't, he'd be a year behind. Tiff said that's just the reality of living here. And Cody said: then why do we live here? That's the whole episode. Two people, born and raised in Utah County, 30 years old, who had never lived anywhere else, taking apart the year that followed. Were we running away or choosing to leave? Is there even a difference? Does moving 3,000 miles actually fix anything, or does it just take you off autopilot and hand you the controls? We get into the parts nobody posts about too. No nanny, no babysitters, no community, and the strange loneliness of a life you fought this hard to get. And the question we're still sitting with: if nobody would be disappointed in you, and you knew everything would work out, what would you change about your life? We're not experts. We're question askers. Welcome to episode one.
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Observed September 20, 2026. Cached outside the daily freshness window; the positions keep the date they were taken on.
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