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Published by Lorissa Violet
Welcome to Above Average. For the women who want the career, the family, the marriage, AND the personal goals. Candid conversations about it all! Being a high achiever doesn't mean you have it all figured out. It means you never settle. Hosted by Lorissa Violet
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When Gabby began experiencing concerning symptoms at six months pregnant with her third baby, she knew something wasn’t right. What followed was a long and frustrating journey of appointments, questions, and searching for answers before she finally received a diagnosis that would change everything: cancer, with a mass in her colon and lesions on her liver. In this episode of Above Average, Gabby shares what it was like navigating a life-altering diagnosis while becoming a mother of three, undergoing treatment, and learning just how important it is to advocate for yourself when it comes to your health. We talk about the symptoms she wishes she had pushed harder on, what she learned about navigating the medical system, conventional and holistic approaches she explored throughout her journey, motherhood in the middle of treatment, and why she now wants other women to trust themselves when they know something isn’t right. This conversation is about more than cancer. It’s about asking questions, seeking another opinion, advocating for your body, and refusing to accept “everything is fine” when you know it isn’t. Gabby is now on the road to recovery and using her experience to help other women advocate for their health. Above Average with Lorissa Violet is a podcast for people who want to think deeper, live intentionally, and refuse to settle for average. Discover Lorissa’s List at LorissaViolet.com — a trusted search platform for vetted products, providers, resources, and expert-backed research for women and families. Disclaimer: This episode shares personal experiences and is for informational purposes only. It is not medical advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare professional regarding your individual health and treatment.
Celebrity makeup artist Niki Metz has built a career in beauty that has taken her from working with names like Tori Spelling and Diane von Furstenberg to Paris and New York Fashion Week—but her story goes far beyond what happens in the makeup chair. In this episode of Above Average, Niki sits down with Lorissa to talk about her decades in the beauty industry, the lessons she's learned working at the highest levels of fashion and entertainment, and the next chapter of her career: opening NEOS Atelier, her own studio offering makeup, microblading, facials, and elevated esthetic services. But for Niki, beauty has always been about something deeper: being of service to the person sitting in front of her. Niki also opens up about one of the most personal chapters of her life—her breast cancer diagnosis and the journey that ultimately led her to some of the world's leading holistic practitioners. She shares how investigating the potential root causes of her illness led her to discover an infection in her mouth that she believes was connected to her breast cancer, and what she learned about looking beyond a diagnosis and asking deeper questions about the body. Now cancer-free, Niki shares how the experience changed her perspective on health, beauty, purpose, and the kind of work she wants to put into the world. In this episode: • Niki's path to becoming a celebrity makeup artist • Working with Tori Spelling and Diane von Furstenberg • Behind the scenes at Paris and New York Fashion Week • Why she decided to open NEOS Atelier • Makeup, microblading, facials, and her approach to beauty • Why being "of service" is at the heart of her work • Her breast cancer diagnosis and healing journey • Working with leading holistic practitioners • The oral infection she believes was connected to her breast cancer • Why asking questions and looking for root causes became so important to her • How surviving cancer changed the way she sees beauty, health, and life Explore more from Lorissa: Discover Lorissa's List, The Ledger, curated products, trusted providers, and more at LorissaViolet.com . The health experiences discussed in this episode are personal experiences and are shared for informational purposes only. They are not medical advice.
Shayne Lamas has spent nearly her entire life in the spotlight. The daughter of Hollywood icon Lorenzo Lamas, she grew up surrounded by fame, went on to win The Bachelor, starred in reality television, and lived a life that—from the outside—looked quintessentially Hollywood. But there is so much more to Shayne’s story. In this episode of Above Average, Shayne opens up about what it was really like growing up in a famous family, being up for the role of Serena van der Woodsen on Gossip Girl alongside Blake Lively, and one of the wildest chapters of her life: meeting Nik Richie in Las Vegas and marrying him less than 24 hours later. But what I found most fascinating is where Shayne is today. After a lifetime of attention, cameras and public interest, she has intentionally chosen a much quieter life—one centered around her children, her family and being the best mother she can be. We talk about fame, identity, relationships, motherhood, walking away from the need to be seen, and what happens when the life you once thought you wanted no longer feels like the life you're meant to live. Shayne is funny, candid, completely herself, and full of stories you truly cannot make up. This is such a fun—and unexpectedly meaningful—conversation. Listen to Above Average now on YouTube and everywhere you listen to podcasts. And for more of what I’m loving, researching and recommending, visit LorissaViolet.com and join the Lorissa’s List community.
In this episode of Above Average , Lorissa sits down with forensic psychologist Dr. Leslie Dobson for an eye-opening conversation about criminal behavior, manipulation, online predators, social media, and what parents need to understand about the digital world their children are growing up in. Dr. Leslie brings her experience working within the criminal justice system to break down how predators think, how seemingly innocent online behavior can create vulnerabilities, and why awareness — rather than fear — is one of our greatest tools. The conversation also dives into the psychology behind high-profile cases and public narratives, including the Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni legal battle, and what Leslie’s forensic perspective can teach us about separating emotion, perception, evidence, and fact. This episode isn't about living in fear. It's about becoming harder to manipulate, more aware of the world around you, and more intentional about what you share, who you trust, and how you protect your children. Above Average is hosted by Lorissa Violet and explores the conversations, ideas, experts, and perspectives that challenge us to think differently and live beyond average. For Lorissa's trusted recommendations, vetted providers, products, resources, and the Ledger, visit LorissaViolet.com .
What if your wardrobe was one of the most overlooked tools for improving your confidence, regulating your nervous system, and helping you achieve your goals? In this episode, Lorissa sits down with Chellie Carlson, stylist and image consultant, to discuss the powerful connection between personal style and personal growth. Together, they explore how dressing with intention can change the way you feel, how others perceive you, and ultimately how you show up in every area of your life. Whether you're navigating motherhood, growing a business, or stepping into a new season, this conversation is packed with practical advice you can implement immediately. For more trusted recommendations, educational resources, and a curated collection of vetted products, providers, and restaurants, visit LorissaViolet.com and explore Lorissa's List—helping women make healthier, easier, and more informed decisions every day. Chellie’s Favorite Bras Found Here https://shopmy.us/collections/6736702
Description Plastic surgery is one of those topics everyone has an opinion about—but very few people are having honest conversations about it. In this episode of Above Average, I sit down with Dr. Juan Rendon, an Ivy League-trained, board-certified plastic surgeon and one of the few surgeons in the country to hold both an MD and PhD. Together, we dive into Botox, fillers, facelifts, mommy makeovers, scars, recovery, and how to make informed decisions without fear or pressure. Whether you're considering a procedure or simply curious, this conversation is packed with practical advice, expert insight, and an honest perspective on aging naturally and confidently. Here is a link for 10% off of all of Dr Rendons favorite product: https://shopmy.us/collections/6646354
If you've ever called yourself the unorganized one, the scattered one, the Type B one.. you're going to relate to this episode! Madison Fisher came on the pod calling herself Type B. By the rapid-fire at the end, we've learned she's a closet Type A trying to hit a bar she has no systems to reach. What We Cover → Why "Type B" is often the label a Type A woman puts on when she doesn't have systems → The Zeigarnik Effect, explained with the waitress-and-the-check story → Why the planning session you did on paper ended up in the trash the next day → The 1 to 4am nocturnal planning hour almost every overwhelmed woman knows → Open loops, why they drain you, what actually closes them → The two biggest causes of procrastination (perfectionism + overwhelm = freeze) → The "I feel bossy" block that keeps women from setting clear delegation expectations → Why your husband will never see the tabs you have in your brain → The one thing Madison is doing tonight, and the one thing you should try too Heard Yourself In This Episode? If you're ready to close the 89,544 tabs open in your head, CEO Mode walks you through building ONE home for every task in your life (work and home included), in one afternoon. Build it here → go.alexpayetta.com/ceomode Want somewhere free to start? This free guide shows you exactly where your hours go, and how to get 10+ of them back every week. Grab the PDF here → go.alexpayetta.com/timeback Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Madison Fisher linktr.ee/madisonbontempo | @madisonbontempo Timestamps 0:00 Meet Madison Fisher 3:00 Five kids, cheer, dance, brand deals, Wittles 8:00 Why Madison cleans before the cleaning lady shows up 14:00 The Type B reveal and what it actually is 18:00 Open loops, working memory, and why Madison can't sleep 25:00 The planning session Madison and Kyler did once and never looked at again 30:00 The Four Tendencies rabbit hole 34:00 Lorissa's screenshot-to-sister calendar hack 40:00 The review routine that matters more than the system itself 46:00 House manager versus more childcare 54:00 Why Madison feels "bossy" setting expectations 1:02:00 The roles and responsibilities conversation with Kyler 1:10:00 Zoloft and where the anxiety actually lives 1:15:00 Rapid fire and the closet Type A confession
Lorissa spent months trying to optimize every minute, and right before her birthday her body just quit. For the first time in her life she could not power through, and it cracked something open. This is the monthly catch-up. Two kid birthdays, an anniversary, turning 35, and a real reckoning with where your worth actually comes from, plus a back-to-back run of going viral that turned into a test of handling hate online. What We Cover → The epiphany that hit when being optimized started costing Lorissa the parts of life she actually wanted → Why she had to untangle her sense of worth from the number on her paycheck, and the exercise that helped her do it → What Alex does the second a hateful comment lands in her nervous system, plus the tool Lorissa swears by for the feelings logic cannot talk you out of Heard yourself in this conversation? Not caring what other people think has never come naturally to Alex. Staying steady when it lands takes real work, and the routine that keeps her grounded is what she teaches inside Wake Up Different. 👉 go.alexpayetta.com/wud Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. 👉 lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Timestamps 0:00 A month later, and a big birthday season 0:33 When being optimized starts taking the life out of life 1:22 The week her body refused to power through 1:45 Why she thinks the physical was emotional 3:46 The realization that her worth got tied to her income 5:02 Goals are financial, joy is not, and the gap between them 5:44 Going back to her 20-year-old self to thank her and let her go 7:06 The conscious brain and the subconscious pulling opposite ways 9:26 What systems are actually supposed to do for you 9:55 Bringing her husband into the business 10:31 Alex's month, going viral and the wave of hate that followed 11:06 Can you really just not care, or does it still land 13:47 Alex's reset when a comment gets under her skin 14:19 Clearing what is underneath with NET 18:04 Why the end of the night is when it gets you 21:26 Tapping, and how to actually do it 22:30 Quick catch-up wrap
You've spent years building something people trust with their face. Then somewhere in the middle of running the business, the brand, and the household, the version of you that started it all can get buried under everything you're holding. Nicole Smith is the injector behind @lipsandlattes and the founder of HēBē Skin Health in Claremont and Laguna Beach, and a mom of three. A routine antibiotic once swelled her brain and took her ability to drive, to read, even to find her own car in a parking lot, and it also took her fear, which is exactly what pushed her to open her own practice. She came on for her first-ever podcast to talk about what it takes to run a luxury, public-facing business as a mom, and which viral beauty trends are actually worth it. What You'll Learn → The insane antibiotic scare that ultimately drove Nicole to start HēBē → Why she didn't name the clinic after her viral handle, and what that decision was really protecting → The part of the business she finally handed off after years of doing it all herself → Where her burnout actually comes from and the small reset she swears by → The beauty treatments she says are a waste of money, and the two things every woman should start in her mid-30s → What she prioritizes when she hires so her office is a place you actually want to be Everything you're holding at once Running a business, a brand, and a household means a hundred things live in your head at any moment, and the ones that matter keep losing to the ones that feel urgent. The fix is getting it out of your head and into one system you actually use, so nothing falls through the cracks. I made a free 15-minute training that walks you through how to build it. Watch here → go.alexpayetta.com/training Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. 👉 lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Nicole Smith hebeskinhealth.com | @lipsandlattes Timestamps 0:00 Meet Nicole Smith, the injector behind Lips & Lattes 3:16 Why the brand and the business have different names 7:38 The health crisis that pushed her out on her own 12:59 Losing her fear, and deciding to open a business 13:29 Building HēBē with three little kids and a leap of faith 19:11 Juggling the clinic, the social, the injecting, and three kids 23:08 Handing off the social, and a saturated market 30:24 Her hard line on lip filler and teens 40:10 Burnout, and where it actually comes from 44:41 How she and her husband split the business and the home 58:09 Where to find Nicole
Somewhere along the way, "this is hard" became the highest compliment we paid motherhood. Lorissa and Alex get into why hard-versus-easy is the wrong filter entirely, what they would put in its place, and why calling motherhood the hardest job in the world might be doing moms more harm than good. What We Cover → The filter Alex uses instead of hard-versus-easy, and why it changes how you see almost every decision → Why Lorissa won't call motherhood the hardest job in the world, and the reframe she uses instead → The thing a first-time mom said to Lorissa in a group that she still thinks about years later → The pushback against discipline, and why Alex isn't buying it Know it's worth it and still not getting to it? Alex believes that hard versus easy is the WRONG filter, and the real question is what a thing gives back and whether that's worth it. Her free PDF walks you through the filter she actually uses instead, sorting what's essential from what you're only doing because you should, so you know what to own, delegate, protect and delete. Grab the PDF here → go.alexpayetta.com/timeback Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Timestamps 0:00 Catching up, and the reel that sparked it all 0:48 Why hard-versus-easy is the wrong filter 1:35 "I don't think motherhood is the hardest job in the world" 3:06 The blanket comparisons we use to validate moms, and why they don't hold up 7:18 The comparison trap, and the benefit lens that breaks it 7:51 Why your hardest moments are also your most rewarding ones 10:34 The mom group, the emergency vet, and saying the unpopular thing 14:11 The pushback against discipline neither of them is buying 15:20 When looking for things to be mad about becomes the whole problem
You used to be the person who would book the flight without thinking twice. Then you had kids, and the part of you that loved to go somewhere got packed away with everything else, and you started to wonder if it was gone for good. Amanda Kellner Klein decided it wasn't. She's a brand partnerships exec, she writes about traveling after kids on her Substack, and her almost-four-year-old already has more than 50 flights to her name. She came on to talk about how you hold onto the parts of yourself that matter once the kids arrive, with all the real logistics, the trade-offs, and one airplane story you have to hear to believe. What You'll Learn → The travel muscle that makes a trip with a four-year-old feel easy, and why the only way to build it is to go when it's still hard → The comeback to "they won't even remember it" that ends the argument for good → The filter Amanda uses to decide whether a trip is worth it, and the step most people skip so "someday" never comes → The packing system that means nobody ever asks "who has the diapers" mid-flight → Why lowering your expectations is the real secret to a good trip with kids, not a consolation prize → The night-flight advice everyone repeats that Amanda says is mostly wrong → The airplane bathroom story that made everyone in this episode swear off something for life Heard Yourself In This Episode? The things that matter most are almost never the urgent ones, so they're the ones that keep getting pushed for years. Alex's free guide walks you through the filter that decides what you own, what you delegate, what you delete, and what you PROTECT, because the trip only happens once it lands in that last column. Grab the PDF here → go.alexpayetta.com/timeback Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Amanda Kellner Klein carryon.substack.com | @amandakellnerklein
Lorissa woke up one morning and finally felt ready to let go of the kids a little. After touring 25 schools and finding every one of them terrible, she realized the schools were never the problem. The timing was. A hosts-only catch-up on the pull between loving your work and loving being home, and how you actually know when it's time to let go. What We Cover → The real reason Lorissa said no to 25 schools (and what finally changed) → Why "I'd love to stay home" and "I'm obsessed with working" can both be true at once → How Alex redesigned her work so she's actually available to her kids → The membership Lorissa's husband pushed for two years that covers childcare, an office, and a workout in one → Why trying to find "balance" might be the thing keeping you stuck Heard Yourself In This Episode? The first step to figuring out a balance that really works for you is understanding how you're spending your time NOW, and how you SHOULD be spending it. Alex's free guide walks you through exactly that. Grab the PDF here → go.alexpayetta.com/timeback Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Timestamps 0:00 What minis are, and what's new 0:25 Lorissa's epiphany and finally feeling ready 2:42 The pull between staying home and building something 6:00 Why both can be true (the shades of gray) 7:06 How Alex designs work around the kids 10:13 The Lifetime idea that covers childcare, an office, and a gym 11:32 The wall you have to hit (like sleep training) 13:01 Discernment, intuition, and taking action 15:15 Why chasing balance is a disservice
Allison Brewer opened her med spa with a one and three year old at home, no door on her treatment room, and no front desk because she wasn't sure anyone would show up. Two weeks in, so many patients were walking through the door that she had to hire a front desk. She's the founder of Masters MedSpa in Irvine and a second generation injector who travels the world to stay at the top of her field. She came on to talk about what it actually takes to grow a business while you're raising little kids, and somewhere in there she also explains why everyone's face looked overfilled for a decade. What You'll Learn → The part of the business Allison handed to her husband that she swears she'd never have grown without → Why she hired too fast, kept the wrong person nine months too long, and what finally made the hard conversation doable → The "homework" her husband kept pushing that ended up running the whole company → Why Lorissa thinks burnout is a choice, and the red flags Allison catches before it lands → What most overwhelmed moms are missing (and why Lorissa says staying home is harder than running her business) → The decade-long mistake Allison says injectors are finally walking back → How to know within the first sixty seconds whether your injector is good or about to wreck your face Heard Yourself In This Episode? Systems are the backbone of a successful business AND a successful life. Alex's free 15-minute training breaks down the system she uses to manage the mental load so her brain doesn't have to. Watch it here → go.alexpayetta.com/training If you already know you want help clearing the 3,430 open tabs in your mind, Alex will walk you through building CEO Mode step by step. Build it here → go.alexpayetta.com/ceomode Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Specifically looking for the Epicutis skincare mentioned on the show? shopmy.us/collections/3876535 Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Allison Brewer masters-medspa.com | @masters.medspa
You picked a major at eighteen, and somehow that one decision still gets to decide what you are allowed to do with the rest of your life. In this catch-up, Lorissa and Alex get into leaving corporate, translating those skills into something of your own, and why the systems that actually stick are the ones built around how your brain works instead of someone else's. What We Cover → Why the major you picked at eighteen is not the lane you are stuck in, and how Lorissa and Alex each rebuilt a corporate skill set into something of their own → Lorissa on launching Lorissa's List before it was ready, and why a messy first version beats waiting for perfect → Why most task systems fall apart by Friday, and what makes one finally stick Where to Start If you need to finally close the 9,439 open tabs in your mind in just one afternoon so you don't have to try to remember everything anymore, this is for you. Build it here → go.alexpayetta.com/ceomode Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Timestamps 0:00 Welcome back, and why this one is a catch-up 0:15 Lorissa's List, and the corporate job it traces back to 2:15 Taking your skills out of corporate without making the job your identity 4:16 Alex on turning Fortune 500 systems work into coaching women 4:50 You are not stuck in the lane you picked at eighteen 6:06 Getting fired, and why the next thing comes in phases 7:18 Launching Lorissa's List before it was ready 9:08 The brand-content year that did not work, and playing to your strengths 10:14 Phase two of Lorissa's List and learning by shipping 11:08 Life update: five days solo with the kids 12:37 Alex on building CEO Mode 13:36 Getting the mental load out of your head 15:22 Why Asana works for life at home too 18:28 Build around your brain, not someone else's
By the time you fall into bed at the end of the day, your body has nothing left. Not for affection, not for intimacy, not for the part of your relationship that used to be effortless. Nobody told you this was the trade. Cindy Scharkey has been an OB/GYN nurse for almost 40 years, and what she kept hearing from women is that nobody is having this conversation. So she started having it. What You'll Learn → The "one tank of energy" reality and why your sex life is the first thing it drains → Why scheduling sex doesn't work the way most couples do it (and what does) → What "responsive desire" is, and why most women have been measuring against the wrong thing their whole lives Heard Yourself In This Episode? Cindy points out there's only ONE tank of energy, and your marriage is pulling from the same one as your job and your kids. The Stress Loop quiz helps you figure out which of the four loops is draining it, and what to do differently starting tomorrow morning. Take the quiz here → go.alexpayetta.com/quiz Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Cindy Scharkey, RN cindyscharkey.com | @cindyscharkey Mentioned in This Episode → Permission for Pleasure: Tending Your Sexual Garden cindyscharkey.com/permission-for-pleasure-book → Permission for Pleasure podcast cindyscharkey.com/podcast — short topical episodes good for couples to listen to together → Uberlube uberlube.com — Cindy's recommended lube. Code CINDY for 15% off Timestamps 0:00 Why this conversation, why now 1:30 Cindy's background and why she started talking about this publicly 6:00 The "one tank of energy" — sex pulls from the same well as everything else 10:00 Responsive vs spontaneous desire (and why the movies lied) 15:00 Scheduling intimacy without it feeling like a chore 20:00 The 4% change that brings desire back 25:00 The fear-of-pregnancy "hand brake" nobody talks about 30:00 Decentering intercourse — what "sex" can actually mean 35:00 Where to start when you don't know where to start 40:00 Why painful sex isn't normal, and the lube conversation
Sometimes you're in the rhythm and everything feels good. Sometimes the rhythm breaks and you have to rebuild your week from the ground up. In this catch-up, one of us is in each season. Alex and Lorissa catch up on where they each actually are right now.. one of them in the most grounded season she's had in a while, one of them hitting a wall and re-working how she runs her week. The conversation wanders into the Emma Grede "three-hour mom" debate, the judgment between working moms and stay-at-home moms, and why kids turn out how they turn out regardless of what we do. What We Cover → The moment Lorissa realized compounding Fridays was never going to catch her up → The Emma Grede "three-hour mom" take and the problem with judging other parents' choices → Why Lorissa's third baby year has felt completely different than her first two Lacking Energy? Alex attributes her energy to finally being back in her routines. Wake Up Different walks you through the 10-minute morning and evening routine she swears by, so you're more focused, energized, and grounded. Get started here → go.alexpayetta.com/wud Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Timestamps 0:00 Alex's "I feel lucky all the time" season 2:15 Morning gratitude walks with a 4-year-old 3:48 Lorissa hits a wall, Lorissa's List takes off, and the one-day-a-week model breaks 6:30 Why being particular means being involved 8:10 Not blending work and kids, even when the baby is just chilling 11:22 Third-baby year: why time actually feels slower this time 14:05 The Emma Grede three-hour mom debate 17:40 Judgment between working moms and stay-at-home moms
You keep trying new supplements, new workouts, new morning routines, and something still feels off. The thing nobody is checking is usually the thing running underneath all of it. Dr. Sam Riley is back for round two. This time we go deep on blood sugar.. why it sits at the root of hair loss, insomnia, weight that won't budge, hormone issues, fertility struggles, and the anxiety that seems to come out of nowhere. What You'll Learn → The everyday symptom most women write off as "just hangry" that's actually a red flag for something much bigger → Why intermittent fasting is making a huge group of women feel worse, and how to know if you're in that group → The four foods Dr. Sam pulls first when someone says "I've tried everything and nothing is working" → What a continuous glucose monitor actually shows you in two weeks (and why the first week you shouldn't change a thing) → The protein number that makes women's jaws hit the floor, and the math that makes it doable → How food order at a single meal can completely change the way your body responds Heard Yourself In This Episode? Dr. Sam kept coming back to the same thing.. consistency with the basics. Wake Up Different is the 10-minute morning and evening routine that turns the basics from a daily fight into your DEFAULT. Get started here → go.alexpayetta.com/wud Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Dr. Sam Riley rileychiro.com | @dr.samriley Mentioned in This Episode → Ashley Barrett Wellness barrettwellnesscenter.com — Virtual Nutritional Therapy Practitioner → Diabetes with Dani @diabeteswithdani — Creator of Conquer Your Diabetes, a Type 1 program for kids and women → Levels levelshealth.com — continuous glucose monitor → Cyrex Labs cyrexlabs.com — food sensitivity and autoimmune testing
Eight months of broken sleep and a head full of shoulds. This is the mini where Alex talks about sleep-training Scarlett, and the hardest part of it actually being just undoing everything she'd told herself about what she was supposed to do. Lorissa, who's immune to the shoulds, has great advice on how to ignore the conflicting noise. What We Cover → Why "what's best for the baby" isn't what you think → How anti-sleep-training messaging kept Alex questioning her own intuition for eight months straight before she called it → Why the shoulds in motherhood can sneak up on you, and what it means to "be your own camp" Take the Stress Loop Quiz If you don't feel like a version of yourself you love (like Alex felt for the past 8 months), the Stress Loop quiz helps you figure out which of the four loops is draining you, and what to do differently starting tomorrow morning. Take the quiz here → go.alexpayetta.com/quiz Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Timestamps 0:00 Alex is finally sleeping 1:30 Eight months of broken sleep and the home birth community 4:00 Co-sleeping, home birth, and why they get tied together 7:00 Identity, camps, and the should spiral 10:00 Weaning Scarlett and letting the baby decide 13:00 "Be your own camp"
You've tried the charts, the timers, the consequences, the gentle approach, and your kid is still melting down every morning before anyone's out the door. What Randy Free teaches is the middle ground many parents are actually looking for, somewhere between gentle parenting and old-school discipline, and it works for all kids (even neurodivergent ones). Randy Free is a family counselor and retired international tax partner who spent 30 years in high-pressure corporate environments before building the PEACE-ful Parenting Process for neurodivergent kids and the high-achieving parents trying to figure out what actually works. What You'll Learn → A simple framework for deciding which battles to fight and which ones to let go, so you stop trying to correct everything at once → What's actually happening in your child's brain during a meltdown, and why your calm matters more than your consequence → The story Randy tells about kicking his own son's door down in anger, and what his son remembered years later (it's not the lesson) Take the Stress Loop Quiz This episode all comes back to the mom's nervous system setting the tone for the entire house. If you've been moving at a pace that leaves no room for patience, that shows up in every interaction with your kids. The Stress Loop quiz helps you figure out where your capacity is actually breaking down so you can start building it back. Take the quiz here → go.alexpayetta.com/quiz Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Randy Free coachtoresilience.com Take Randy's free PEACE-ful Parenting Self Assessment to see where your parenting lands → drive.google.com/file/d/1t5k06pPR-OeTqDBiMIJh_bE4j9phnhra/view Timestamps 0:00 Meet Randy Free and his path from tax partner to parenting counselor 2:45 The PEACE acronym and how peaceful parenting differs from gentle parenting 6:30 The parenting quadrant, choosing your battles with red, blue, green, and yellow 12:15 Alex and Lorissa on the consistency struggle between partners 18:00 Nature vs. nurture and how neurodivergent brains process emotions differently 23:30 Mirror neurons and why your kids absorb your stress 29:00 The volcano exercise for teaching kids their own warning signs 35:00 Repairing after you lose your temper 40:45 When kids question authority and where to draw the line 48:00 Over-scheduling and what transitions do to a child's nervous system 55:00 Structure vs. flexibility for neurodivergent kids 1:00:00 Parenting a highly intelligent child who is emotionally behind 1:05:00 How to work with Randy and where to find him
Nobody warns you that getting dressed postpartum is going to make you cry before church. Lorissa and Alex talk about body changes after kids, the identity shift that comes with them, and what actually helps. What We Cover → The postpartum closet meltdown nobody warns you about and why it costs you more than time → How Lorissa went from always being "the smallest" to gaining 80 lbs and completely rebuilding her relationship with her body → The one closet move that stopped mornings from turning into a full emotional spiral Take the Stress Loop Quiz The reason getting dressed takes so long is the dread that comes with it, and dread costs energy you already didn't have. The Stress Loop quiz helps you figure out which of the four loops is draining that tank before you ever get to the closet. Take the quiz here → go.alexpayetta.com/quiz Lorissa's List Lorissa's curated list of the products, services, and providers actually worth your time, all vetted to a higher standard so you can skip the search. → lorissaviolet.com Connect With Us Lorissa Violet lorissaviolet.com | @lorissaviolet Alex Payetta alexpayetta.com | @alexpayetta Timestamps 0:00 Intro and the five-minute challenge 0:24 Why getting dressed is the biggest time suck 1:22 Lorissa's identity shift from always being "the smallest" 2:54 The emotional weight of postpartum body changes 4:47 Sobbing before church in leggings 5:54 Outfit wins, fails, and the maternity romper incident 6:22 The strapless gala dress disaster 7:21 Packing nursing outfits for Japan 8:09 Acceptance, button-ups, and the brief blip mindset 9:19 Body dysmorphia and panic-buying the wrong sizes 9:55 Husband gift fails (triple XS and XXL) 11:19 Why clearing out your closet actually feels like freedom
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Observed September 14, 2026. Cached outside the daily freshness window; the positions keep the date they were taken on.
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