Established Family Podcast

If you fear God, it should change the way you treat your spouse. Many Christians are asking God to restore their marriages while continuing to live, speak, and make decisions in ways that demonstrate little reverence for Him. But what if the very thing standing in the way of your marriage's restoration isn't simply your spouse's behavior, your circumstances, or your past—but your own irreverence toward God?In this episode of the Established Family Podcast, Derek continues our study through Ephesians, moving from unproductive deeds to unwholesome words, and examining how our reverence for God should govern every area of our lives. We're confronting the connection between irreverence, spiritual immaturity, and the condition of our marriages. From the words we speak to the counsel we receive, the intimacy we pursue, the children we raise, and the decisions we make, our lives reveal what we truly honor.

In Part Two of Jordan's testimony, she shares the deeply personal journey that followed her encounter with God after discovering Derek's affair. What began as a decision to repent became a season of testing, refining, rebellion, and ultimately, a revelation of the Father's heart that would change everything.From the moment the Holy Spirit instructed her to ask Derek what he loved about the other woman, to walking through New Age practices, sexual immorality, and deconstructing her faith, Jordan shares the parts of their story that are rarely discussed.This isn't a testimony about following the perfect blueprint for marriage restoration. It's about what happens when God begins exposing the belief systems, rebellion, and broken identity that existed long before the marriage ever fell apart.In this episode, Jordan shares:What obedience looked like when there was no guarantee her marriage would survive.How God used an unexpected conversation about the affair to begin healing both Derek and Jordan.Why repentance cannot be conditional upon your spouse's response.Her journey through New Age practices, compromise, and searching for peace outside of God.How the Lord began restoring her understanding of His eyes, His hands, and His heart as a Father.The moment she realized her rebellion against God existed independently of anything Derek had done to her.What happened when Derek encountered God and began leading their home in an entirely different direction."Godly sorrow produces repentance without regret." — 2 Corinthians 7:10 True repentance isn't simply about changing your behavior to save your marriage. It's about allowing the Lord to transform your inner self, restore your identity, and produce fruit that remains regardless of your circumstances.

There was a time when the marriage and family we have today looked impossible.Infidelity. Addiction. Financial devastation. Spiritual manipulation. Depression. Broken trust. Years of pain that left very little evidence that our marriage would ever become what it is today.In this documentary, Jordan Palizay shares her side of the testimony.She opens up about what those years looked like from her perspective, what was happening behind closed doors, the places where she had lost hope, and the journey the Lord took her on as He began healing, delivering, restoring, and rebuilding our marriage and family.This isn't a testimony about two people who figured out how to have a better marriage.It's a testimony of what Jesus can redeem when a marriage looks beyond repair.Today, Derek and Jordan have dedicated their lives to helping husbands and wives experience the same freedom, healing, and restoration they first had to walk through themselves.This is Jordan's testimony.

What if repentance in your marriage is about more than acknowledging what you did wrong?What if there are things God designed your marriage to produce—fruit, calling, ministry, identity, peace, stability, and impact—that never had the opportunity to exist because of what was happening in your home?In this episode, Derek breaks down three categories of repentance every marriage needs: repentance for the actual sin, repentance for the hidden and unseen fruit it produced, and repentance for the absence of what should have existed according to God’s original design.

What has God’s rain produced in your marriage?We often cry out for God to send the rain—to give us revelation, wisdom, mercy, direction, confirmation, provision, and breakthrough. But Hebrews 6 gives us a different question to consider:What is the rain producing when it falls on the soil of our lives?“For soil that drinks the rain which often falls on it and produces crops useful to those for whose benefit it is cultivated, receives a blessing from God.” — Hebrews 6:7 AMP

In this teaching, Derek and Jordan continue The Battle for Your Will and uncover how the enemy works through deception, opposition to truth, unrepentance, and ultimately the human will to accomplish his purposes.We’re breaking down:What Scripture reveals about the devil’s desires, will, works, and schemesWhat it means to be “caught alive” to do his willHow your own will can come into agreement with the enemy’s desiresWhy correction and repentance are directly connected to escaping his captivityHow to recognize when what you believe is “light” may actually be darknessWhy the fruit and works of your life and marriage reveal what your will is actually serving

What does your life actually testify about who is fathering your marriage? You can say you want restoration. You can say you’re standing for covenant. You can say you’re following the will of God. But Jesus said, “The works that I do in My Father’s name testify concerning Me.” (John 10:25) In this teaching, Derek continues The Battle for Your Will series by confronting the difference between a righteous desire and a will-level decision that actually produces speed, fruit, and completion.

In this teaching, Derek walks through the biblical meaning of thelō and shows why your willingness—not your spouse's response—is often the gateway to movement, obedience, and fruit in your marriage. Through passages like John 15, Matthew 15, Matthew 16, John 5, and Mark 10, you'll see a consistent pattern: God responds to people who have settled the battle of their will.

In Part 1 of this series, Derek teaches one of the most overlooked realities in Scripture: God didn't create you without a will. He created you with one. The question is whether your will has been sanctified and brought into agreement with His. Tax Deductible Donation as an individual or an organization: https://www.EstablishedFamily.com/give Apply for Established Family Trusted (in-network or out-of-network provider): https://www.EstablishedFamily.com/trusted Host The Marriage Academy at your church, small group, or organization: https://www.EstablishedUniversity.com/host

What if the greatest threat to your marriage isn't a major crisis but years of delay, distraction, and spiritual compromise?In this Marriage Wisdom episode, Derek walks through Scripture to expose how the enemy uses fear, indecision, and misplaced focus to keep husbands and wives from God's purpose. It's time to recognize the battle, stop partnering with delay, and walk in the promises God has already spoken over your marriage

In Part 4 of The Faithful Spouse, Jordan shares the testimony that completely transformed our marriage. Long before our marriage was restored, God confronted her with a truth she never expected:She had been an unfaithful wife... even though she had never committed adultery.

Most couples think they're trying to decide the future of their marriage. They're not. They're trying to make eternal decisions while still operating from a hardened heart, a compromised conscience, and an insincere faith. That is a dangerous place to be. In this episode, Derek confronts one of the biggest lies in Christian marriage culture: that being "at an impasse" is simply a season to survive. Scripture says otherwise.You'll discover: The 3 things that MUST be true before you can make faithful decisions about your marriage. Why most couples are trying to optimize brokenness instead of healing from it. The biblical meaning of a pure heart, a good conscience, and a sincere faith (1 Timothy 1:5) The counterfeit expressions Satan uses to keep marriages bound. Why true restoration always begins by addressing the actual condition—not managing the symptoms. If your marriage has been marked by conflict, betrayal, emotional distance, pornography, anger, fear, control, pride, or repeated cycles that never seem to end, this conversation will challenge you to stop treating the fruit and finally confront the root.

In Part 2 of The Faithful Spouse, Derek walks through Scripture to show why the fear of God, the peace of God, and an eternal perspective are essential if you are going to remain faithful in your marriage. We discuss why anxiety cannot become the governing system of your thoughts, emotions, and decisions, and what Scripture says about the God of peace being with His people.Whether you're standing for restoration, navigating betrayal, dealing with addiction, conflict, or simply fighting to remain steadfast in your covenant, this message will challenge the way you think about peace, faithfulness, and spiritual maturity.Scriptures Discussed:• 2 Corinthians 4:17–18• Romans 8:24–25• 1 Thessalonians 5:23• Hebrews 13:20–21• Psalm 34:18• Isaiah 57:15• Matthew 11:28–30• James 4:8–10• Philippians 4:6–9• Nahum 1:7

When most people hear the word unfaithfulness, they immediately think of adultery, affairs, addiction, or betrayal. But what if Scripture defines unfaithfulness much deeper than that?

In Part 4 of our Breaking Marriage Curses series, we confront one of the most dangerous conditions a husband or wife can fall into:Spiritual sluggishness. Lukewarmness. Apathy. God is not calling husbands and wives to survive their marriage.He is calling them to be diligent. Steadfast. Immovable. Full of faith. Full of hope. And fully surrendered to His process of transformation.

In Part 3 of our Breaking Marriage Curses series, we tackle one of the most destructive forces operating in marriages today: pride. Not just arrogance. Not just stubbornness. But the stiff-necked spirit Scripture repeatedly warns about from Genesis to Revelation.

In this episode of The Established Family Show, Derek dives into one of the most destructive forces operating inside struggling marriages: the spirit of provocation. Many spouses find themselves trapped in a cycle of constantly being provoked—or provoking their spouse in return—while unknowingly empowering chaos, division, bitterness, and spiritual blindness.

Tax Deductible Donation as an individual or an organization:https://www.EstablishedFamily.com/giveApply for Established Family Trusted (in-network or out-of-network provider):https://www.EstablishedFamily.com/trustedHost The Marriage Academy at your church, small group, or organization:https://www.EstablishedUniversity.com/host———What happens when a spouse begins to wander?Not just physically… but spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and relationally?In this deeply confrontational and biblical teaching, Derek breaks down the “curse of wandering” through scripture, exposing how rebellion, hardness of heart, spiritual blindness, and separation from the presence of God create wandering spouses, wandering minds, and wandering marriages.

JORDAN'S BACKKK AFTER MATERNITY LEAVE! ...she's talking about the process of learning to trust me as a husband again.———Tax Deductible Donation as an individual or an organization:https://www.EstablishedFamily.com/giveApply for Established Family Trusted (in-network or out-of-network provider):https://www.EstablishedFamily.com/trustedHost The Marriage Academy at your church, small group, or organization:https://www.EstablishedUniversity.com/host

Tax Deductible Donation as an individual or an organization: https://www.EstablishedFamily.com/give Apply for Established Family Trusted (in-network or out-of-network provider): https://www.EstablishedFamily.com/trusted Host The Marriage Academy at your church, small group, or organization: https://www.EstablishedUniversity.com/host———There is a form of spiritual development that looks like wisdom… …but never produces transformation.A generation obsessed with: — healing — optimization — self-awareness — frameworks — systems — emotional intelligence — routines — discipline — ascetic practices — endless discovery …yet still spiritually movable. In this episode, Derek walks through the biblical difference between spiritual maturity and counterfeit maturity. Through Hebrews 6, Colossians 2, James 3, Ephesians 4, Galatians 4, and more, this teaching exposes how elementary principles, man-made philosophies, pseudo-spiritual teachings, and self-powered transformation quietly captivate believers while leaving marriages spiritually weak and unstable. This is not merely a teaching about behavior modification. This is a confrontation against: — spiritually immature Christianity — self-powered sanctification — counterfeit wisdom — emotionally driven spirituality — ascetic substitutes for holiness — “always learning” but never becoming mature in Christ A spiritually mature spouse becomes steadfast. Immovable. Discerning. Peaceful. Holy. Fruitful. Unwavering. And when maturity enters a covenant……the marriage itself becomes harder to move.