Mothering From Within

Kaili Ets — mom of two, pediatric occupational therapist, certified infant craniosacral therapist — shares the news she's been sitting on for 18 months: she's officially a pediatric osteopath. In this deeply personal episode, Kaili explains what osteopathy actually is (and how it differs from physio, massage, and chiro), traces the 9-year journey that led her here — from meeting her first osteopath in Toronto to finding her mentor Terra Nicolle in Stoney Creek — and opens up about a piece of the story she's never shared before: how completing this program became a way of honouring her late father, who always believed in this dream before she let herself believe in it. She also gets real about what she'll miss from the program, what's changing in her clinic starting now, and what's coming in the next episode. In this episode: What osteopathy actually is, and how it's different from physio, massage, and chiro The 10-year backstory: from a craniosacral therapist in New York to finding her mentor in Stoney Creek The personal reason she finally said yes to this program — a tribute to her late father What finishing an 18-month program with a tight-knit cohort actually feels like How this credential changes what she can offer at her home clinic (and who it's covered for) The mindset shift this training required of her, and why patience was the hardest part A sneak peek at what's coming next episode Timestamps: 00:00 — Podcast intro & welcome 00:50 — Disclaimer 01:05 — The big news: officially an osteopathic manual therapist 01:15 — What osteopathy actually is (and how it's different from physio, massage, and chiro) 03:05 — Where this dream started: New York, craniosacral therapy, and finding Leah in Toronto 05:05 — Meeting Terra Nicolle and finding this program 06:05 — The real reason she said yes now — a tribute to her dad 07:10 — 18 months, gone in a blink: the cohort, the goodbyes, the last lunch 09:00 — What she'll miss (including her own monthly bodywork) 09:30 — What actually changes now for her clinic and her clients 10:10 — The patience this training demanded of her, plus a new party trick 11:05 — Closing thoughts & a sneak peek at next episode 11:50 — Outro: subscribe, share, and review Links & Resources Come and see me in-person - book your first appointment here . Free guide: Calm Baby Blueprint → freebie.kailiets.com/calm-baby Course: Baby Bodywork at Home ($37) → courses.kailiets.com/baby-bodywork 📲 Follow Kaili on Instagram: @theholisticbabyguru Please note: nothing shared in this podcast is medical advice. All content is for educational purposes only and does not replace your own healthcare provider. Loved this episode? Subscribe to Mothering From Within, share it with a mama who needs it, and leave a review wherever you listen — it really helps the show grow.

Ep. 81 | Bedtime Battles and Toddler Meltdowns: Why Play Works Better Than Bribes with Dr. Kim Van Dusen Okay, listen... if bedtime, bath time, or getting shoes on in the morning feels like a nightly negotiation in your house, this episode is for you. I'm joined by Dr. Kim Van Dusen, licensed marriage and family therapist, registered play therapist, and author of the brand new book Parenting Through Play . Dr. Kim has spent 25 years teaching parents a different response to meltdowns and defiance... one that doesn't involve bribes, punishments, or counting to three in a very strained voice. We talk about why play is the language your child speaks before they can explain what they're feeling, why "play first" changes an entire household, and the small, 30-second playful moments that make bath time, bedtime, cleanup, and getting out the door so much easier. You're not imagining it... the fastest, most overwhelming hour of your day is also the one your child needs you most. What We Cover [3:00] The "choo-choo" story that changed everything Dr. Kim shares the moment she stopped bribing and threatening her own son at pickup and used play instead... and how fast he responded once she spoke his language. [8:00] Inside Parenting Through Play Why Dr. Kim wrote the book she wished existed: modern, practical, and built on three evidence-based approaches (play therapy, solution-focused therapy, and positive behavior supports). [11:00] "But I'm not a playful person" Dr. Kim debunks the biggest myth about the book... you don't need 30 minutes on the floor. Small, purposeful "play pockets" are enough. [12:00] Where our resistance to play actually comes from A look at generational parenting patterns, and why so many of us have a gut reaction that play feels like "rewarding bad behavior." [14:00] Flip the script: play first Why putting play before homework, chores, or your own to-do list leads to more cooperation, not less. [18:00] Play isn't just for kids The mental health case for play at every age, and why our own nervous system regulation comes first. [24:00] Bedtime battles and the biggest separation of the day Kaili and Dr. Kim connect the dots between play, connection, and why evenings are so hard for toddlers and preschoolers. [26:00] Rethinking bath time Dr. Kim's first piece of advice: bath time doesn't have to happen at night. If it's raising stress instead of lowering it, move it. [29:00] Playful bedtime routines that actually work Animal transformations, the "robot wind-up," a dragon that keeps watch at night, and the stuffed-animal trick for toddlers who keep waking up. [32:00] Quick wins for the two hardest moments The toy factory countdown and freeze clean for cleanup battles, plus the volcano game and sensory stepping stones for getting out the door. [36:00] Wellness winks Dr. Kim's 30-second, twice-a-day self check-in for regulating your own nervous system so you can show up for theirs. [41:00] Rapid fire and where to find Dr. Kim Play-Doh or kinetic sand, this week's play trick, and the one thing every parent needs to hear. Key Takeaways Play isn't a reward for good behavior... it's the thing that makes good behavior possible. Flip the order and see what happens. Bath time and bedtime don't have to happen back to back. If your routine is raising cortisol instead of lowering it, change the order. You don't need big blocks of time. A 30 second animal transformation or a "toy factory" countdown can shift the whole moment. Regulated parents raise regulated kids. A quick self check-in twice a day matters more than we think. Give yourself grace. Tomorrow is a new day, and your kids don't need a perfect parent... they need one who keeps showing up. About Dr. Kim Van Dusen Dr. Kim Van Dusen is a licensed marriage and family therapist, registered play therapist, mom of two, and host of The Parentologist Podcast. She's part of the Today Show parenting team and the author of Parenting Through Play , out now. Resources and Links Book: Parenting Through Play by Dr. Kim Van Dusen, available wherever books are sold (Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and independent bookstores) Website: theparentologist.com Podcast: The Parentologist Podcast (Apple, Spotify, and YouTube) Instagram: @theparentologist Loved this episode? Subscribe to Mothering From Within for more nurturing insights, share it with a mama who needs it, and leave us a review wherever you listen. Tag me on socials @theholisticbabyguru ... I'd love to hear which play trick you try first.

Ep 80 | What Your Baby's Sleep Position Tells You About Their Body Have you ever noticed that your baby always ends up in the same position? Head turned the same way... one arm always up... or sleeping with their head tilted way back, chin up, like they're looking behind themselves? You're not imagining it. And it's not just a quirk. Your baby's body is always moving toward comfort and away from discomfort. So the position they gravitate to over and over is actually a window into where tension might be living in their little body. In this episode, I'm walking you through the most common sleep position patterns I see as a pediatric occupational therapist, what each one can suggest, and the one position that gets missed all the time... the head tilted back, neck extended position that can be a sign your baby is working harder than they should be to breathe. A quick but important note: this episode is all about OBSERVING your baby, not repositioning them. Safe sleep rules don't change. Back to sleep, firm flat surface, no pillows, every single time. In This Episode, You'll Learn: → Why the position your baby gravitates to is information, not randomness (and what your own body does at the end of a long day that proves it) → The 4 most common position patterns and what each one can point to: The consistent head turn to one side (and how it connects to feeding, flat spots, and movement development) The C-shaped body curve The strong arch or extension preference (these babies get called "strong"... but that's not the whole story) Asymmetrical arms or legs → Why a baby who sleeps with their head tilted back, chin up, may be instinctively opening their airway... and why that position deserves real attention → A warm, simple explanation of infant airway anatomy and why babies are naturally more prone to airway narrowing → Where the tongue is supposed to rest during sleep, and the 2 big reasons a tongue ends up resting low (body tension vs. a true tongue tie... and why not every low tongue is a tie) → The signs that often travel together with a compromised airway: snoring, mouth breathing, restless or thrashing sleep, heavy sweating, waking unrefreshed, feeding difficulty → Exactly what to do if you're noticing these patterns: what to gently encourage during awake time, what NOT to try to fix, and when to seek a proper assessment that looks at airway, tongue function, and the body together The Big Takeaway Your baby's body is always communicating. The position they gravitate toward, the way they arrange themselves, even the way they tilt their head to breathe... it's all information. Not necessarily problems. Information. And once you know how to read it, you can support your baby in a way most parents never get the chance to. Resources Mentioned 🌿 FREE GUIDE: 10 Baby Signs Dismissed as Normal ... The head turn preference and the sleep signs from this episode are both covered inside. It walks you through what to look for and when it's worth paying closer attention. --> https://freebie.kailiets.com/10-baby-signs-lm ✨ Baby Bodywork at Home (Mini Course) ... If you've noticed something and you want to start supporting your baby's body hands-on at home, this teaches you how. --> https://courses.kailiets.com/baby-bodywork 💜 Mothering From Within (The Book) ... Like a good friend, therapist, and mentor in one. Evidence-informed, attachment-focused guidance on milestones, baby sleep, reflux, feeding, mama mental health, and so much more. https://www.kailiets.com/book Let's Connect If this episode made you look at your baby a little differently, I'd love to hear about it. Come find me on Instagram [ @TheHolisticBabyGuru ] and share what you noticed. And if you loved this episode, it would mean the world if you left a rating and review... it helps more mamas find this show. Warm hugs, Kaili 💜

It's 2am, roughly 11 years ago, in a small apartment in Park Slope. I am on a therapy ball, bouncing hard, because vigorous is the only setting that works. My son will only sleep on my body, and the second the bouncing stops, he wakes up... Sound familiar? In this episode, Kaili takes you back to that ball and teaches you what she wishes someone had taught her then... how to actually look at an unsettled baby instead of just surviving the night with them. You're not imagining it if your baby feels harder to settle than the babies in the group chat. Kaili walks through why settling is a nervous system shift, not a discipline problem, why true self-regulation doesn't come online until age 3 or 4, and what it means to co-regulate instead of waiting for a baby to "self-soothe." She introduces the idea of the "55 baby," the baby who starts the day already partway up the arousal curve, and traces her own son's story, the C-section, the tummy time refusal, the reflux, the constant need for movement, back to one under-supported nervous system. Then she gets practical: body tension, digestive discomfort, sensory overload, and retained primitive reflexes (including the Moro) as the most common physical reasons a baby won't settle, why the usual advice (add more rocking, more white noise, more motion) often just masks the signal instead of resolving it, and what to actually look at across the whole day, not just the hard evening stretch. In this episode you'll learn: Why settling is a shift from the sympathetic to the parasympathetic nervous system, and why a baby's brain isn't built to do that alone The real difference between self-soothing and self-settling, and why co-regulation comes first What a "55 baby" is, and how to recognize one The 4 physical patterns behind most settling struggles: body tension, digestive discomfort, sensory overload, and retained reflexes Why adding more input (more bouncing, more noise, more motion) sometimes works just enough to keep you trying, and never enough to fix it Practical ways to reduce sensory load and look at the whole day's patterns, not just the moment your baby won't settle Timestamps: 00:00 – Welcome to Mothering From Within 01:12 – The therapy ball at 2am 03:08 – What settling actually asks of a baby's nervous system 05:13 – Co-regulation: how babies borrow calm from you 05:47 – Self-soothing vs. self-settling (they're not the same thing) 07:20 – The "55 baby": her son's story 1 0:15 – The 4 most common physical causes behind settling struggles 12:33 – Why the usual settling advice often falls short 13:53 – Practical, body-based steps to try tonight 15:05 – Baby Bodywork at Home 15:39 – Her son, 10 years later 17:43 – If this is you tonight 18:20 – Wrap up Resources mentioned: Baby Bodywork at Home – $47 – the hands-on routine Kaili teaches her 1:1 families, now for your living room floor. If this episode resonated, this is your next step. Mothering From Within (the book) – for the fuller journey through baby sleep, reflux, feeding, and your own mental health as a mama.

You were told to rest for 6 weeks. Then you were "cleared." Back to normal. Except your body doesn't feel back to normal... and nobody explained that a C-section is major abdominal surgery, that 7 layers of tissue were cut and sutured back together, or that the connective tissue in your abdomen takes the better part of a year to remodel. You went home 48 hours later with a newborn and a healing body and an impossible set of demands. And then there's your baby. Who was on the other side of that same incision, in that same moment. In this episode, I'm looking at C-section birth through my OT lens... both sides of it. For mama: what's actually happening with diastasis recti, why your core is a pressure system (not a strength problem), the energy conservation framework I use with clients recovering from surgery, and why 6 weeks is when you begin to rebuild, not when you're healed. Then I'm flipping it completely and talking about your baby. Because the birth canal isn't just a passageway. The cardinal movements of labor are a precise vestibular and proprioceptive sequence, driven by primitive reflexes, that helps begin integrating those very same reflexes. It's a beautiful circular loop. And in a C-section birth (or a forceps or vacuum delivery), that loop doesn't complete... plus there's the traction of the extraction itself, which is its own layer. If your baby arches, resists being curled in, startles hard when you tip them back for a diaper change, or feels tight through the neck and chest... this episode might be the first time someone connects it to the day they were born. I want to be so clear: nothing here is about blame, and nothing here means your baby is damaged. That decision was right for that moment. This is about giving you a lens... and something to work with. In This Episode Why a C-section is major abdominal surgery, not just a different kind of birth (7 layers, and what that actually means) Diastasis recti: what it is, why it matters so much more after a C-section, and why the separation itself isn't the problem Your core as a canister: diaphragm on top, pelvic floor on the bottom, deep abs as the walls... and what happens to pressure management when those walls are healing The OT energy conservation framework: how to think about your day as a budget when the demands are impossible Practical positioning, splinting, and compression tips (snug tank tops and high-waisted leggings should be the motherhood uniform) Why 6 weeks is "medically cleared for certain activities," not "healed" The 8 cardinal movements of labor, and why every single one is a vestibular activation event The feedback loop most parents have never heard of: reflexes drive the movements → movements provide vestibular and proprioceptive input → that input helps integrate the reflexes What it means when that loop doesn't complete The second layer nobody talks about: traction during extraction, and the tension patterns it can leave through the cervical spine and cranial base What all of this can look like in your baby: arching, tone dysregulation, retained Moro, feeding and oral motor difficulties, vestibular sensitivity, unsettled periods (AKA colic) Why I always ask about the birth story... and why it's clinical information, not a formality Timestamps 00:00 – Welcome + my last batch week before the kids come home from camp 02:30 – Why this episode exists (and the Janelle Fontaine episode you should hear first) 03:15 – A C-section is major abdominal surgery: what actually happened to your body 04:30 – Diastasis recti and why it matters so much in C-section recovery 06:15 – Intra-abdominal pressure: your core is a canister, not a six-pack 07:45 – The OT piece nobody talks about: energy conservation and pacing 09:30 – Positioning, splinting, compression, scar mobilization 10:45 – The truth about the 6-week timeline 11:30 – Flipping it: your baby was on the other side of that same incision 12:30 – Proprioception and the head-to-toe squeeze of the birth canal 13:15 – The vestibular system: the master regulator of every other sense 15:15 – The 8 cardinal movements of labor and the reflex integration loop 17:45 – What it looks like when that loop doesn't complete 19:45 – The second layer: traction, forceps, vacuum, and cranial base tension 22:45 – Pulling it all together: what you might actually be seeing in your baby 25:15 – If you're feeling guilt or grief or anger right now, hear me 26:30 – What you can actually do about all of this Key Takeaways Your recovery has a timeline nobody told you about. 6 weeks is medical clearance, not healing. Tissue healing takes months. Connective tissue remodeling takes closer to a year. You're not behind... you were given the wrong map. The birth canal isn't just a passageway. It's a precisely sequenced vestibular and proprioceptive experience that helps begin integrating your baby's primitive reflexes. When that sequence is bypassed, the nervous system is still looking for input it was designed to receive. Your baby isn't being difficult. The tension, the arching, the sensitivity, the difficulty settling... that's a nervous system asking for something. Once you know what it's asking for, you can start giving it. Resources Mentioned Ep.75 with Janelle Fontaine of Nurturing the Mother: The C-section recovery conversation for mamas... rest, compression, scar tissue management. The perfect companion to this episode. → Check that out here Baby Bodywork at Home course ($47): Gentle, practical techniques you can start using right now at home to support your baby's body. → Grab the course here Virtual consults: If you want the full picture of what's going on with your specific baby, connecting the dots between the birth story and what you're seeing now. I see families across Canada, the US, and internationally. → kailiets.com Let's Connect If this episode gave you language for something you've been sensing, share it with a C-section mama who needs it... and leave a review on your favorite listening app to help the show grow. Tag me on socials @theholisticbabyguru and tell me what clicked for you. Your baby went through something significant the day they were born. Your body did too. You're both still finding your way into ease, and you're doing it together. That's the whole point. Warm hugs, Kaili 💜

Your baby brings their fists to their mouth constantly. They only settle when they're held a very specific way. They clasp their hands, mouth everything, root even when they're not hungry... and you've probably wondered what it all means (or been told not to worry about it). Here's what I want you to know: none of it is random. All of it has a purpose. In this episode, I'm pulling back the curtain on something I talk about with my clients all the time but have never made a full episode about... the midline. That invisible vertical line running down the centre of your baby's body is one of the most organizing, regulating things their developing nervous system can find. And once you understand it, you'll start seeing it everywhere. In your baby. In your big kids. Even in yourself. We're connecting the dots between hands-to-mouth, sucking, clasping, that "only wants to be held facing in" phase... and what it means when your baby's search for their centre seems frantic or just out of reach. Plus, I'm sharing my favourite hold for calming a baby who's had enough (it's about as close to an instant reset as you can get). Your baby is not being difficult. They're telling you exactly what their nervous system needs. Let's give you the language for it. In This Episode What the midline actually is, and why finding it is so regulating for a developing nervous system How your baby's body develops from the centre out (and why the mouth becomes home base so early) Why hands-to-mouth, sucking, rooting, and clasping are all the same beautiful story The real reason some babies only settle held facing in, tucked against your chest What it can mean when a baby arches away from the midline, or can't quite get their hands to their mouth... and why that's useful information, not a problem with your baby How midline seeking shows up in toddlers, big kids, and yes, in you too (nail biting, collar chewing, ring twisting, swaying... sound familiar?) 4 practical ways to support your baby's midline seeking, starting today My favourite calming hold: midline + sucking + rhythm Timestamps 02:30 – Why I've never talked about this before (and the mastermind moment that changed that) 03:30 – What the midline is, and why it matters so much 04:30 – How your baby's nervous system develops: center first, edges later 06:00 – What my level 3 baby class taught me about the midline in action 07:30 – The 4 main ways babies activate their midline 11:30 – When midline seeking becomes frantic or difficult... and what that's telling you 13:00 – This doesn't stop at babyhood: kids, adults, and the ways we all find our center 15:15 – 4 practical things you can do right now 17:00 – When it's time to go deeper Resources Mentioned Baby Bodywork at Home course ($47): Learn practical, hands-on techniques to release what's in the way, so your baby's own system can find its way back to centre. Right from your living room. → Grab Your Spot Here Ep. 76 | The 10 Baby Signs: The perfect companion to this episode. Fist-to-mouth was sign number 1... now you know the why behind it. Free Baby Signs Guide → Grab Your Copy Here Let's Connect If this episode helped you see your baby a little differently, share it with a mama friend who needs it, and leave a review on your favorite listening app... it truly helps the show grow. Tag me on socials @theholisticbabyguru and tell me which midline behaviour you're suddenly seeing everywhere. Warm hugs, Kaili 💜

10 Baby Signs Dismissed as Normal If you've sat across from a doctor, a mother-in-law, or your mom group and heard some version of "it's fine, babies are like that, you're probably overthinking it"... this episode is for you. Okay, listen. Not an emergency and nothing worth addressing are two completely different things. And both can be true about the exact same symptom. In this episode I'm walking you through 3 of the 10 signs in real depth, the ones I see dismissed the most in my practice: 1. Red, irritated skin creases (neck folds, armpits, behind the knees) It's not always "just chubby folds." Persistent redness can be a tension issue too. When a baby holds tension through their neck, shoulders, or hips, those creases don't open and close the way they're supposed to. Worth a closer look if it's worse on one side, keeps coming back, or your baby seems uncomfortable when you clean it. 2. Head-turning preference "They just have a favorite side" is doing a lot of work it shouldn't be doing. A baby who consistently turns one way isn't forming a habit, they're working within a limitation. This one rarely stays contained to just the head. It can show up in flat spots, a feeding preference for one side, and tummy time frustration. 3. Reflux (or "colic") that just doesn't resolve Reflux is common. Common does not mean it doesn't deserve a real look. Medication manages stomach acid, it doesn't address what's causing the regurgitation in the first place. If symptoms haven't meaningfully shifted after a few weeks, or you've cycled through medications or formula changes... your gut is telling you something worth listening to. I also name (but don't go deep on, they each get their own full breakdown in the guide): Shallow latch, chomping, lip blisters, clicking during feeds The curled, tense baby who fights diaper changes and sleeves The stiff, arching baby everyone calls "so strong" Flat head shape Motor milestones out of sequence (rolling one direction only, bum scooting instead of crawling) Inconsolable crying Sleep patterns that get waved off as normal when they're not, and vice versa The thread through all of it: these aren't 10 separate problems. They're one story, told 10 different ways. A baby's system carrying more load than it needs to, showing up in a handful of places at once. You've been noticing these things for a while now. You weren't imagining it. You just didn't have the language yet. Grab the Free Guide All 10 signs, in the same depth we covered here for the first 3: 10 Baby Signs Dismissed as Normal Next Steps If something in this episode named what's been going on with your baby: Local to Hamilton? Book an in-person session . Anywhere else in Canada or the world? Check out the Baby Bodywork at Home course , hands-on techniques you can start using today from your living room floor. More From Kaili My book, Mothering From Within , is available now --> https://www.kailiets.com/book A gentle disclaimer: nothing on this podcast is medical advice. It's provided for educational purposes only and doesn't replace your own medical or healthcare provider.

If you had a C-section and left the hospital with a list of things you can't do and almost nothing about how to actually heal — this episode is for you. Kaili sits down with Janelle Fontaine, a registered massage therapist, postpartum doula, and cesarean recovery specialist based in Vancouver. Janelle created the Caesarean Recovery Guide specifically because she kept meeting mamas who had no idea that a C-section is major abdominal surgery — or that real recovery can take one to two years. The visible incision, she says, is just the tip of the iceberg. There's so much more happening beneath it. In this conversation, Janelle and Kaili cover: Why the typical hospital discharge guidance falls so short — and why mamas are often sent home with a list of restrictions but nothing that actually empowers them to heal. What's actually happening in the body during a cesarean — including the layers of tissue, the different incision directions involved, and why pulling sensations, numbness above the scar, hip pain, and even shoulder pain can all trace back to that scar. The recovery timeline nobody talks about — why the six-week mark is not the finish line, and why hearing "it takes one to two years" can actually feel like relief. Janelle's four pillars of cesarean recovery: Rest — slowing down in the early weeks without guilt, and understanding what your body is actually doing Compression — snug, breathable support that helps manage inflammation and support your core as you heal Core connection — rebuilding that brain-body conversation, starting with conscious breath as early as a couple of hours post-op, and why pelvic floor physio is relevant even for C-section mamas Scar tissue mobilization — when to start (typically once the incision is fully closed, usually around 6–8 weeks), what to do before that, why infection resets the clock, and how this goes so far beyond just massaging the scar Is it ever too late? Janelle shares why the answer is almost always no — and why mamas 10, 16, even 40 years post-cesarean are still finding meaningful change when they finally get support. They also touch on matrescence — the identity transformation of becoming a mother — and why we need to give ourselves the same grace we'd give a brand-new employee still finding their footing. Janelle's one thing she wishes every C-section mama was told at discharge: seek support . Know who to turn to — an RMT, a pelvic floor physio, a chiropractor, an osteopath — so that when something comes up, it doesn't feel so big and scary. Find Janelle: 🌿 Website: nurturingthemother.ca 🌿 Instagram: @nurturingthemother 🌿 Caesarean Recovery Guide: available at nurturingthemother.ca 🌿 Caesarean Scars: Variations of Normal project — collecting real-life C-section scar photos to create a resource showing the full range of what normal healing actually looks like. Submit your photos via the link in Janelle's Instagram bio, or follow @ismyscarnormal 🌿 Practitioner training: Janelle teaches healthcare professionals (RMTs, chiropractors, osteopaths, doulas, and more) how to support C-section mamas — in-person and virtual two-day courses available Resources from Kaili: 🌿 Calm Baby Blueprint (free guide) — https://freebie.kailiets.com/calm-baby 🌿 Baby Bodywork At Home ($47 course) — https://courses.kailiets.com/baby-bodywork Timestamps 00:00 — Welcome 01:12 — Meet Janelle Fontaine 02:43 — How she found her way to C-section recovery work 05:51 — The massive gap in C-section care at discharge 09:31 — A rabbit hole: big babies, birth weight guessing, and trust 11:51 — What's actually happening in your body during a cesarean 15:33 — Healing timeline and symptoms to pay attention to 19:06 — The four pillars of recovery: rest, compression, core connection, scar mobility 22:07 — Matrescence: the identity transformation of becoming a mother 24:19 — What postpartum support could look like if society caught up 25:11 — Pillar two: compression — snug, breathable, and purposeful 27:07 — Pillar three: core connection from breath to pelvic floor physio 29:21 — Pillar four: scar tissue mobilization — when, how, and the right mindset 32:21 — What happens when there's an infection, and why it resets the timeline 34:25 — Is it ever too late? (Spoiler: no) 37:49 — Janelle's one thing every C-section mama deserves to know 39:17 — Rapid fire + the case for postpartum doulas 41:32 — Janelle's resources, the Caesarean Recovery Guide, and the Variations of Normal project Know a mama who had a C-section and was sent home with almost no guidance? Send this to her. She deserves to know this exists. Subscribe, leave a review, and tag Kaili on socials @theholisticbabyguru 💜

If you've been following along this month and thinking, "Okay, I get it now… but what do I actually DO?" — this episode is your answer. In Ep.74, I'm pulling back the curtain on baby bodywork. What it actually is. What a real session in my clinic looks like, start to finish. And why so much of this work can be done by you, at home, without any special equipment, without clinical training, and without putting your baby through anything uncomfortable. That last part surprises people the most. This work is gentle. It's slow. Most of the time it looks less like therapy and more like a really intentional kind of holding. In this episode: [00:52] Why I keep coming back to body clues — and what mamas are really asking when they say "I get it, but what do I DO?" [02:32] What baby bodywork actually is (and what it isn't). No tables, no cracking, no forcing. It's about listening to the body and creating the conditions for tension to release. [04:56] A real, full clinic session walkthrough — why I always start at the hips, not the head, and what I'm reading when I lift a baby under their arms. [08:03] Working up through the pelvis, spine, ribs, shoulders, neck, and base of the skull. What I'm feeling for, how I respond to fussing, and what calming rhythmic input actually does for the nervous system. [09:52] Why the mouth comes last. Going straight to the mouth without addressing the body first means working against the grain. This is the piece most feeding assessments miss. [11:50] What parents can actually do at home. You are already the most regulating presence in your baby's world. When you understand what you're doing and why, your hands stop being just hands. [12:51] Baby Bodywork at Home — the same head-to-toe process I use in every session, taught through video, adapted for you to do at home. No jargon, no clinical detachment. Just clear, warm, practical guidance. And yes, it includes the mouth. [14:37] Who this course is actually for. If you've been paying attention this month, noticing the head-turning preference, the one-sided lean, the tension you can feel but can't quite name yet… this is for you. Baby Bodywork at Home is just $47 → courses.kailiets.com/baby-bodywork Not ready yet? Start with the free Calm Baby Blueprint linked below. Links mentioned: 🌿 Baby Bodywork at Home → courses.kailiets.com/baby-bodywork 🌿 Calm Baby Blueprint (free) → https://freebie.kailiets.com/calm-baby Find Kaili: 📲 Instagram @theholisticbabyguru Nothing shared in this podcast is medical advice. All content is for educational purposes only and does not replace your own healthcare provider.

If feeding has been persistently, confusingly hard — and you've already done all the things — this episode is for you. You've seen the consultants. You've tried the positions. You've adjusted the latch. Maybe you've even had a tongue-tie assessment, or a release, and feeding got a little better but not all the way there. And you're still sitting with that quiet, nagging feeling that something is being missed. You're not imagining it. In this episode, Kaili offers a completely different lens for what might actually be going on — because in her experience, the feeding advice hasn't been wrong. It's just been answering the wrong question. Here's what we explore: The jaw and neck are where most feeding stories actually begin. When a baby is born, their body absorbs significant compression and force — and tension in the jaw, neck, and base of the skull can linger long after birth is over. That tension affects how wide a baby can open their mouth, how freely their jaw moves during feeds, and why certain feeding positions feel genuinely uncomfortable for them. (This is often why a baby feeds beautifully on one side and struggles on the other — it's not your anatomy. It's their neck.) Tongue tie gets most of the attention when feeding is hard — and it matters when it's present. But the tongue is a muscle, and its function depends entirely on the structures around it. When the jaw and floor of the mouth are tight, the tongue gets held down by tension , not by a frenulum. And when the tongue can't cup and elevate the way it needs to, a whole cascade begins: weak seal, air intake, gas, reflux, inefficient milk transfer, a baby who tires quickly and is hungry again too fast — and a supply that starts to feel precarious. Kaili also speaks to nipple pain. Sore, cracked, or bleeding nipples are not just "part of early motherhood." They're often a signal that something in the baby's oral mechanics isn't working the way it should — and that deserves to be investigated at the level of the body, not just the frenulum. The good news? A body problem is something that can be worked with. When tension in the jaw and neck releases, the tongue gets its freedom back — and the whole cascade starts to reverse. Resources mentioned: 🌿 Calm Baby Blueprint (free guide) — your starting point for understanding where your baby's body might be holding tension 👉 https://freebie.kailiets.com/calm-baby 🌿 Baby Bodywork at Home — the $47 self-study course where Kaili walks you through the hands-on techniques she uses in sessions, so you can start working with your baby's body at home 👉 https://courses.kailiets.com/baby-bodywork Timestamps 00:00 — Welcome 01:11 — When feeding is persistently, confusingly hard 02:42 — Why surface-level fixes miss the root cause 03:46 — Jaw and neck tension from birth 05:55 — Tongue function beyond tongue tie 08:00 — The reflux and supply cascade 10:13 — What nipple pain is actually telling you 11:29 — How releasing body tension changes everything 12:45 — Resources and next steps 13:30 — Closing: the right question to ask If this episode resonated, please share it with a mama in your world who is white-knuckling every feed and being told her latch looks fine. She might need to hear this first. Subscribe, leave a review, and tag Kaili on socials @theholisticbabyguru

Your baby can't say "my neck is tight" or "this position hurts" — but their body has been telling you anyway. The arching during feeds. The one-sided head turn. The baby who will only settle if you hold them just right. These aren't quirks, and they're not things your baby will simply grow out of. They're communication. And in this episode, Kaili teaches you how to finally understand what your baby has been trying to say. In her clinic in Stoney Creek, Ontario, Kaili looks a baby's body within the first 30 seconds — before she says a word, before she suggests anything, before she even properly introduces herself. Not because she's magic, but because the body communicates. It always has been. If you've ever felt like something was off with your baby but couldn't put it into words — this episode is for you. In this episode, Kaili walks you through 5 body clues she looks for in every new baby: Head-turning preference — what a consistent side preference actually means (and why birth matters more than most people realize) Body symmetry — why one shoulder sitting higher, or one leg that doesn't move the same way, shows up as feeding struggles and sleep problems Feeding behaviour — the difference between a latch issue and something deeper going on in the body How they settle (or don't) — what it means when a baby can only calm in one exact position, and why this is a nervous system story, not a behaviour problem Overall tone — what floppy and stiff actually signal, and why the quiet, low-tone baby deserves just as much attention as the tense one Kaili also talks about the shift that changes everything for the mamas she works with: moving from "what is wrong with my baby?" to "what is my baby trying to tell me?" — and how that single reframe opens the door to real answers. You're not imagining it. Your instincts are almost certainly picking up on something real. 🎁 Free resource: Grab Kaili's Calm Baby Blueprint — a gentle starting point for reading your baby's body — at https://freebie.kailiets.com/calm-baby 📚 Ready to go deeper? Baby Body Work at Home teaches you the same gentle techniques Kaili uses in clinic, one step at a time --> https://courses.kailiets.com/baby-bodywork 📲 Find Kaili on Instagram @theholisticbabyguru Timestamps: 00:00 — Welcome & intro 00:52 — Disclaimer 01:50 — Why body clues matter (and why no one teaches this) 02:20 — What Kaili notices in the first 30 seconds 04:19 — Clue 1: Head-turning preference & neck tension 05:28 — Clue 2: Body symmetry (shoulders, hips, arms) 06:34 — Clue 3: What happens during and after feeds 07:44 — Clue 4: Settling ability & nervous system regulation 08:44 — Clue 5: Overall tone — floppy vs. tight 09:58 — "I knew something was off but everyone said he was fine" 11:06 — The Calm Baby Blueprint (free guide) & Baby Body Work at Home 11:52 — Share this with a mama who needs it

You had a picture of what motherhood was going to feel like. Maybe it was vivid. Maybe it was just a warm, hopeful blur. And then your baby arrived — a whole person, with a whole nervous system and a whole set of needs that are entirely their own. In this episode, Kaili sits down with you for an honest, no-pressure conversation about the gap — the space between the motherhood you imagined and the one you're actually living. If you've felt grief alongside the love, or quietly wondered whether you were built for this... this one is for you. In This Episode: The picture you had before your baby arrived — and what it means when reality looks different Why grief and love can (and do) live side by side in early motherhood How we hold motherhood to a completely different standard than every other new beginning in our lives The thoughts most mamas never say out loud — missing your old life, wondering if you were built for this — and why they don't mean what you think they mean What Kaili has seen in 18 years of working with babies and children: why the most sensitive babies grow their mamas into something remarkable A personal check-in from Kaili this month — and the reminder we all need that progress doesn't always look the way we pictured it Resources Mentioned: Feeding Without Fight — Kaili's complete bundle on understanding baby reflux and oral motor dysfunction, and why they're almost always connected. Two complete courses | $67 | Lifetime unlimited access → Click Here To Learn More Connect with Kaili: Instagram: @theholisticbabyguru Tag Kaili when this episode resonates — she loves hearing from you. If this episode helped you feel a little less alone, please subscribe, share it with a mama who needs it, and leave a review on your listening app of choice.

What does it actually feel like to run a sold-out mom and baby class series — not the highlight reel, but the real version? In this episode, Kaili pulls back the curtain on her years of leading Babies at Play classes and shares the honest, behind-the-scenes truth that nobody told her before she started. From the beautiful exhaustion of holding space for an entire room of mamas and babies at once, to the butterflies she still gets before every single class (yes, even after hundreds of them), this one is for the mamas who want to understand the person showing up for them — and for the pediatric and postnatal professionals who've been quietly wondering if running classes is something they could do too. Kaili reflects on what made her transition from clinic-based OT to class leader so unexpectedly meaningful, why forgetting the words to a song she's sung a hundred times doesn't faze her anymore, and the profound privilege of being trusted with the most sacred and vulnerable moments of a new mother's journey. If you've ever wondered what goes on behind the scenes of the work — this is the episode. In this episode: Why running a group class asks something completely different of you than one-on-one clinical work The thing Kaili didn't expect when she started — and still surprises her every time Why she still gets butterflies before every class (and why she's grateful for them) What she would tell herself before running her very first class The privilege of watching babies and mamas grow — and why it never gets old A message for therapists and postnatal professionals who are sitting on the idea of running their own classes Resources mentioned: 🎓 Babies at Play Professional Course — how over 100 therapists have gone from curious to running their own sold-out classes 📖 Mothering From Within — Kaili's international bestselling book, full of evidence-informed, attachment-focused guidance on milestones, sleep, reflux, feeding, and more Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome to the Podcast 00:52 Disclaimer & Intro 01:20 Why This Episode Is a Day Late 01:40 Pulling Back the Curtain 03:14 From Clinic OT to Class Leader 04:28 The Real Exhaustion of Holding the Room 05:48 The Butterflies That Never Go Away 07:29 The Privilege of Being Trusted 08:50 What I'd Tell Myself Before My First Class 10:32 A Resource for Professionals 11:04 Closing Message The butterflies are worth it. The exhaustion is worth it. The privilege of watching babies and mamas bloom together — worth every single bit of it.

Have you ever left a professional appointment with your baby feeling like something was missed? Like you could see something was off — but no one else could? In this episode, Kaili takes you inside her clinical eye and walks you through exactly what she's looking for in the first few minutes with any baby. The things that aren't on standard milestone charts. The things that don't get flagged at routine checkups. The things most professionals simply haven't been taught to look for. From arousal state and body tension to head position, skin creases, facial symmetry, and movement patterns — Kaili shows you how all the "separate" things your baby is doing (the fussiness, the feeding struggles, the tummy time meltdowns, the sleep issues) are often one story happening in one body. And she gives you a simple place to start noticing it yourself — right at home, starting today. In this episode you'll learn: Why arousal state is the very first thing Kaili assesses — and what it tells her before she's done anything The two tension patterns she sees most often in babies (extended and stiff vs. curled and clenched) What head-turning preference really means — and how it connects to feeding struggles on one side Why skin creases that stay red and raw are actually a sign of muscle tension, not just a moisture problem The face, the lips, and the eyes — and what subtle asymmetry is telling you about the rest of the body How movement patterns (tummy time, rolling, transitions) reveal how the nervous system is organizing the whole body A real-life example: a four-month-old with reflux, sleep issues, and tummy time struggles — and how Kaili reads it as one connected story Simple things you can start observing at home today Resources mentioned: 🔗 [ The Calm Baby Blueprint ]— Free home assessment guide to help you spot signs of body tension 🔗 [ Baby Body Work at Home Mini Course ] — Gentle techniques you can do at home to ease tension and support feeding, reflux, and sleep Grab my book - Mothering From Within - on Amazon or your local online book retailer

Ep.68 | Why Your Baby Won't Settle (And It Has Nothing To Do With What You're Doing) You've tried the routine. You've tried the swaddle. You've tried the white noise, the swing, the side-lying feed. And still — your baby is fussy, unsettled, or just working so hard to get through the day. Before you blame yourself (or their "difficult personality") — there's something almost nobody is telling you to look at. And once you see it, everything starts to make sense. In this episode, Kaili breaks down the nervous system piece that sits underneath so much of what gets labeled as colic, reflux, bad sleeping, difficult temperament — and why the real starting place is almost always the body , not the behaviour. You'll learn: Why what happened during pregnancy and birth matters far more than most practitioners will ever tell you What primitive reflexes are, why they sometimes don't fully integrate, and how that shows up as feeding struggles, sleep resistance, and sensory overwhelm How body tension (which often starts in utero ) can make everything from tummy time to lying flat feel genuinely uncomfortable for your baby What sensory processing actually looks like when a baby's nervous system is running at full volume The specific signs that point to a nervous system root cause — and why they're so often missed This episode is for you if: Your baby had a long, fast, or interventive birth (forceps, vacuum, C-section) Feeding has been hard from the beginning — one-sided latch, clicking, gassiness, reflux Your baby arches, always turns one way, or seems tense to hold Sleep never feels truly settled, even when you've done everything "right" Your gut says something's off — but everyone keeps telling you they're fine Your baby isn't giving you a hard time. They're having one. And there's almost always a reason — a physical, nervous system reason that has nothing to do with your parenting, your consistency, or your baby's character. Free Resource Mentioned: 🎓 Red Flags & Root Causes Workshop (free, on-demand) — go deeper on exactly what to look for in your baby's body. Want to keep going? DM Kaili ROOT on Instagram @theholisticbabyguru and she'll send you the free workshop link directly. 📖 Grab Kaili's book Mothering From Within Kaili Ets is a Pediatric Occupational Therapist, Certified Infant Craniosacral Therapist, and mama of two with 18 years of clinical experience. Nothing in this podcast constitutes medical advice — always consult your own healthcare provider.

Kaili Ets, mom of two and pediatric occupational therapist, shares a real-life look at what nervous system regulation actually looks like in early motherhood. It’s not about staying calm all the time—it’s about what you do when things feel hard. She walks through a moment many parents will recognize: coming home after a full day to a house that feels overwhelming, plans that didn’t happen, and a nervous system that’s starting to unravel. Instead of pushing through, she notices it, names it, and chooses to step away for a restorative yoga class—creating space to reset before coming back to her family. Using her Rooted in Regulation Map™—safety, embodiment, flow, and rhythm/predictability—Kaili shares simple, grounded ways to support both yourself and your child through hard moments. She explores what it looks like to lead with connection, to stay present without forcing calm, and to hold space during big emotions—even if that means quietly sitting nearby while your child moves through it. You’ll also hear practical, doable tools for regulation, including rest, movement, talking things through, writing, physiological sighs, humming, vibration, and even moments of playfulness. This episode is a gentle reminder that regulation isn’t about getting it “right”—it’s about coming back, again and again. Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome to the Podcast 01:20 Hard Day Regulation 02:25 Sunday Chaos Story 03:52 Yoga Reset Moment 04:47 Rooted Regulation Map 06:42 Regulating With Kids 07:45 Holding Meltdown Space 10:23 Connection Over Control 12:08 Realistic Regulation Tools 14:27 Practice Coming Back 15:32 Messy Enough Resources & Next Steps: • Free On-Demand Training: Rooted in Regulation • Holistic Baby Flow Method • Book: Mothering From Within • Connect with Kaili Instagram Website

Kaili Ets introduces the Mothering From Within podcast and explores something many parents don’t hear enough—you need safety too. In the early years, parenting doesn’t just shape your baby’s nervous system, it deeply impacts your own sense of calm, confidence, and trust in yourself. She explains how, as you begin to feel safer and more regulated, your baby often starts to settle too—not because you’re doing everything perfectly, but because you’re showing up in a steadier, more connected way. Kaili walks through gentle, real-life signs that your nervous system is shifting: less late-night Googling, less second-guessing, calmer decision-making, a softer tone, slower movements, more patience, and even moments of enjoying your baby… right in the middle of the hard. She invites you to reflect on what would feel supportive for you , reminds you that needing help is not a failure, and shares simple ways to begin building that sense of safety—for both you and your baby. This episode also includes a brief medical disclaimer and resources for deeper support, including a free on-demand training, her Holistic Baby Flow Method, and her book Mothering From Within . Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome to the Podcast 01:11 Safety for Parents Too 02:52 Signs of Nervous System Shift 04:08 Slowing Down in Sessions 04:47 Co-Regulation Over Perfection 06:22 A Question for You 07:20 Support and Next Steps 08:17 Final Wrap and Book Resources & Next Steps: • Free On-Demand Training: Rooted in Regulation • Holistic Baby Flow Method • Book: Mothering From Within • Connect with Kaili Instagram: @TheHolisticBabyGuru Website: www.kailiets.com

If your baby only sleeps on you… wakes the second you put them down… arches, pulls off during feeds… or just feels tense, uncomfortable, or hard to settle… This episode is for you. 💜 Because what if this isn’t about bad habits… or something you’re doing wrong? In this episode, I’m walking you through the missing piece I see over and over again in my work as a pediatric occupational therapist— Your baby’s nervous system. More specifically… their ability to access that calm, settled “brake” state. Because when babies can’t fully access that state yet, their bodies stay a little more alert… a little more braced… a little more “on.” And that can show up as: Frequent waking Contact-only sleep Tense or uncoordinated feeding Arching, pulling off, or fussiness Gas, reflux, or digestive discomfort We’ll talk about why this happens (including body tension, birth forces, sensory overwhelm, reflex integration, and more)… And most importantly—what actually helps. Because your baby doesn’t need more training. They need more support. Inside this episode, I also walk you through: What co-regulation really looks like (and why your baby needs you) The “roots” that support better sleep and feeding: safety, body comfort, and rhythm Simple, practical ways to help your baby feel safer in their body This is the shift from trying to “fix” your baby… to finally understanding them. And once you see it—you can’t unsee it. 💜 🎧 In This Episode 00:00 Welcome to the Podcast 01:11 The Missing Piece in Sleep & Feeding 01:50 Why It’s Not a Bad Habit 02:41 A Personal Story & Nervous System Insight 03:44 The Body’s “Brake” Explained 06:22 Why Your Baby Needs You to Settle 08:01 Co-Regulation & The Roots of Change 09:26 Feeding Through a Nervous System Lens 10:57 Why Sleep Needs Safety First 11:26 Simple Safety Signals You Can Use 13:30 When to Look a Little Deeper 14:57 Wrap Up & Next Steps 🌿 Resources & Next Steps If this episode resonated with you and you’re starting to see your baby in a new way… ✨ Watch the free on-demand training : Learn how sleep, feeding, and tension are all connected—and what you can do to support your baby gently. ✨ Explore the Holistic Baby Flow Method : A step-by-step approach to supporting your baby’s nervous system, body, and development—without sleep training. ✨ Read Mothering From Within : A gentle, grounded guide to helping you trust your instincts and feel more confident in your motherhood. You don’t have to figure this out alone. 💜

How do you know if something is actually helping your baby… or if they’ve just gone quiet? In this episode of Mothering From Within , Kaili walks you through one of the most important (and often misunderstood) parts of baby development: 👉 the difference between a baby who is truly settled and a baby who is simply quiet from overwhelm or exhaustion Because those two things can look very similar on the outside… but feel very different in your baby’s body. Drawing from her work as a pediatric occupational therapist and craniosacral therapist, Kaili shares the subtle nervous system cues she looks for during sessions — the small shifts that tell her when a baby is beginning to feel safer and more comfortable in their body. You’ll learn how to recognize signs like: • hands softening instead of staying clenched • a relaxed jaw • slower, deeper breathing • more even, organized movement • feeding that feels less frantic • transitions (like diaper changes or bedtime) becoming just a little easier She also explains the important difference between: ✨ True regulation (soft, flexible, available) vs. ⚠️ Shutdown or collapse (heavy, still, disconnected) This episode will help you: • understand what “progress” actually looks like in your baby • feel more confident knowing when something is helping • start trusting your instincts as you read your baby’s cues Kaili also shares a simple “3-point check” you can try tonight — looking at your baby’s hands, jaw, and breath — to begin noticing these changes in real time. Because often, the biggest shifts don’t happen loudly. They happen quietly… like a small exhale in your baby’s body. 💜 In This Episode 00:00 Welcome to the Podcast 01:09 Settled vs Quiet — Why It Matters 02:59 Reading Your Baby’s Nervous System 03:39 Quiet Doesn’t Always Mean Regulated 04:24 Signs Something Has “Landed” 05:35 Why Progress Often Looks Subtle 06:02 Calm vs Shutdown 06:32 Everyday Moments You’ll Start Noticing 07:00 Try This Simple Check Tonight 07:27 Reflection + Free Guide 08:06 Closing Resources Mentioned Free Calm Baby Blueprint Guide A gentle, practical guide to help you start recognizing your baby’s body cues and understanding what they may be communicating. 💡 This episode is especially for you if: • you’ve ever wondered “is this actually helping?” • your baby seems calm sometimes but still unsettled underneath • you want to understand your baby beyond just sleep or behavior Disclaimer: This is general education, not medical advice; check with your own providers.

Ep. 63 | Slowing Down So Your Baby’s Nervous System Can Catch Up In this episode of Mothering From Within , Kaili reflects on something she’s still actively practicing in her hands-on work with babies: patience. Our adult brains move quickly—we’re often thinking about the next step, the next task, or the next thing to try. But babies experience the world very differently. Their nervous systems process sensation, emotion, and movement much more slowly than ours. When we move too quickly, babies often show us through cues like crying, arching, restlessness, or difficulty settling. Drawing on insights from her osteopathy training and years of working with infants, Kaili explains why pausing, waiting, and staying present allows the baby’s body to respond in its own time. When given space, nervous systems soften naturally. You’ll hear simple, everyday examples where slowing down can make a real difference, including: • Picking your baby up • Diaper changes • Feeding pauses • Bedtime transitions Kaili also shares a moment from a recent session that reminded her why patience matters so much in this work. This episode invites parents to notice where rushing may be happening in daily routines—and how even a small pause can shift connection and regulation for both you and your baby. If you’re feeling like everything needs to happen quickly with your baby, this episode is a gentle reminder that sometimes slowing down is the support. 💜 In This Episode 00:00 Welcome to the Podcast 01:15 Why Patience Matters in Baby Work 03:10 Why Babies Need More Time to Process 05:51 Everyday Moments Where Slowing Down Helps 08:25 A Session Moment That Changed Everything 09:25 A Reflection for Parents 10:36 Free Guide + Resources 11:09 Closing Thoughts Resources Mentioned Calm Baby Blueprint (Free Guide) A gentle place to start noticing what your baby’s body may be communicating. Mothering From Within (Book) Kaili’s guide to helping parents reconnect with their instincts and understand their baby through a nervous-system lens.