Depressed CEO's

Jim's back from holiday. Two hours after arriving, a car came off the road above the hotel and landed three storeys down into the exact rooms they were meant to be staying in. The car was folded like a deck chair. Then the main event: Dave has been signed up, without his knowledge, to a website where you sell used underwear. We build him a four tier pricing model based on how many pairs he can wear at once, and Fran pitches a way to cut out the middleman. Also: why aeroplane seatbelts are pointless, why the emergency slide should be an option every time, and a long standing misunderstanding about what men do at a urinal. The Depressed CEO Podcast, new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jim's away (a car crashed into his hotel room, he's fine), so it's just the two of us this week with absolutely nothing planned. We get into: the friend who makes birthday cards out of ready meal sleeves and why it's better than anything Clintons could sell you, the ex who owned two knives, two forks and two cups and wouldn't allow a bath mat, resulting in a miniature one being smuggled in and out of the flat in a backpack for months, and what genuinely gives you the ick. Plus TK Maxx as a cultural institution, the discovery of Booths, why being tucked into your napkin at a fancy restaurant feels like being put to bed, the Halloween party where one of us was saved in a phone as Toilet Woman, and a speed awareness course workaround so elaborate it might be the most ADHD thing ever committed to tape. Allegedly. The Depressed CEO Podcast, new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The side of it nobody's talking about, because one of us lives with a Rockstar employee and Dave got a bit of heat for cheering the leaker on. It's not the suits who lose out when the stock drops. Also this week: the theory that Gen Z have taken up birdwatching purely to endear themselves to boomers and usurp millennial inheritance, a full and entirely necessary deep dive into the origins of the name Dave (including the fact that in the mid 70s, 1 in 10 girls were apparently called Dave), and a Welsh cake speed eating challenge that nearly claimed a tooth. Millennial parents: the name Dave is dying. Please consider. What a difference a Dave makes. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we go through the five most unhinged patents ever filed. We also invent our own! Plus: are we slowly googling ourselves to death, the conspiracy about data centres and where all the water is really going, why a man in America got arrested for collecting rainwater, the app that tracks billionaires' private jets, and Lay's creamy forest mushroom crisps divide the room completely. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We go back to 1901 where JP Morgan buys Carnegie Steel for $480 million without spending a penny of his own money and creates the world's first billion dollar company. Then to the 60s, where a cockroach extermination company gets killed by a corporate cockroach. Then to Red Lobster, where a private equity firm sells the land under every restaurant for $1.5 billion, charges them rent on their own buildings, and forces them into a $20 bottomless shrimp deal that loses $11 million in a single quarter. The papers said competitive eaters killed it. They didn't. Also: why there are no crazy inventors anymore, why Bluetooth is still rubbish in 2026, dentists as the new big pharma, French mustard crisps, and the Creature of Kelham The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we're breaking down private equity and asset stripping, how a firm can buy a company using almost none of its own money, saddle that company with the debt, sell the land out from under it, charge it rent on its own building, drain the pension pot, and walk away richer while everyone who worked there loses everything. Also: Kendal Calling and the family with the lucky Baby Bell, why Nolan films are getting too loud, Jamie Oliver banning chewing gum, supermarkets changing prices in real time, and whether you were a Teletubbies real-world-segment kid or not. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jacqueline Gold walks into a boardroom of men in 1981 and pitches the idea of Ann Summers parties. One man stands up and tells her women don't even like sex. Her dad is the only one who backs her. We debate whether it's acceptable to poo on arrival at a dinner party and Fran decided to host a fun little party game based around Sex Toy Reviews! The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Meet Dandy Kim. Blackmailer, gun runner, horse wanker, water ski school operator, and the man who stole sensitive documents from Jack Warner's safe that were never disclosed but were apparently enough to get his jail sentence cut in half and the money written off entirely. We cover the sexual revolution of the 60s, the invention of the mini skirt, why the male contraceptive pill was abandoned, how a woman's name was borrowed without proper consent to launch Britain's most famous sex shop, and why a postal strike nearly killed the whole thing before it started. Also: Dave has an absolutely horrible morning involving a white Land Rover, a wet egg, two pairs of glasses and a dog with a bone. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jamie Oliver goes to war with the Turkey Twizzler on national TV. Sales triple the week after. Farm workers are caught playing baseball with live turkeys. Bird flu arrives from a forbidden corner of Hungary, and a suspicious wrapper turns up in a bin. Count Binface, conspiracy theories, why every millennial woman wanted to be a marine biologist, Gen Z emotions with Dave, and Pete's Loft Goth Removal Services. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we're diving into the gloriously bizarre story of Bernard Matthews. Turkey eugenics, the invention of the turkey roast joint, a 27-year advertising campaign built on one word, and how he made the equivalent of £38.5 million in eight days. David gets a tooth snapped in half by a dentist called Jaguar, we discuss our first celebrity crushes, Jodie Marsh gets the academic treatment she deserves, and Father Jiminy Cricket delivers a prayer against Argentina. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the end of an era. Roman Abramovich gets poisoned in Ukraine, his £5 billion in assets get frozen overnight, and two superyachts worth nearly a billion pounds go on the run to Turkey in a real-life Grand Theft Auto chase. Also: we try blowjob mints, debate electric cars, dive into local Facebook group drama, celebrate the World Cup with a Lay's crisp sandwich, and Dave gets a cake in the face on day one of the new studio after losing a Frankfurter vs Bratwurst quiz. Billionaires can do whatever they want. And it's absolutely fine. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Link Tree: https://linktr.ee/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're in the new studio. There's a gravy hot tub. Dog arses on the wall. It's exactly what you'd expect. This week: Roman Abramovich arrives at Stamford Bridge, bans the colour red, turns up to training in full kit demanding a kickabout, and has £40,000 worth of sushi flown to Azerbaijan by private jet, despite his mate literally being poisoned in a sushi restaurant. We try Japanese snacks in his honour. We also blind rank ten types of fart. Scientifically. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Roman Abramovich sells a Russian oil company he basically stole for $13 billion, Fran delivers an urban myth as a children's bedtime rhyme about a stag do gone catastrophically wrong, Jim reads an original poem about DIY, dead men and the lies we tell each other, and we have a chat about the fact that 95% of people are just making it up as they go. Goodbye old studio. You ferocious beast. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're back! New puppy, same chaos. Dave's adjusting to life as a dog dad in the most unhinged way possible, we conduct a full health and safety risk assessment on his 2am noodle habit and he finally has his first ever crisp sandwich aged 37! We dive into part one of the genuinely mad true story of Roman Abramovich, from a Siberian orphan stealing diesel to the man who bought Chelsea. Oh, and there's a sketch. We won't explain the sketch. The Depressed CEO Podcast — new episodes every week. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We sit down with Amy O'Hara, Development Executive at Warp Films - the Sheffield-based production company behind Adolescence, Dead Man's Shoes, Four Lions, This Is England and some of the most important British films ever made. Amy's career has taken her from DJing at Sheffield's legendary Threads nights, to Film4, the BFI, and now back home to Warp. We talk about how she broke into the industry, what it takes to get a film off the ground, the threat of AI to storytelling, why cinema isn't dead yet - and a very exciting hint at what's coming next from Warp. And we pitch her a few film ideas. She was very patient about it. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we're joined by Carl Maloney, founder of RGM Magazine — the man who's interviewed everyone from John Cooper Clarke to Shaun Ryder, all while championing unsigned bands from Sheffield and beyond. We talk about the night Arctic Monkeys played their very first gig, bombing on stage at an open mic, building a music magazine from scratch, accidentally promoting an AI artist, and why the live music industry is heading for a crash. Oh, and Alex Turner used to ask Carl for advice. Bless him. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're out of the studio. This week we're at the Dog and Partridge in Sheffield - one of Guinness's officially rated top ten pubs in the UK to try the Holy Trinity: Guinness, Murphy's and Beamish, all on tap in one place. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week's guest is Jo Mason - confidence coach, former PE teacher, Navy veteran, and someone who's navigated more in life than most. Diagnosed with stage four cancer in 2021, Jo made a decision. She wasn't going to stop living. We talk burnout, Dubai, bad employers, losing herself - and how cancer, bizarrely, gave her the life she always wanted. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Link Tree: https://linktr.ee/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we're diving deep into one of Britain's most notorious PR men - Max Clifford. Before “fake news” had a name, Max was selling it to the tabloids. He planted affairs, invented headlines, and built a £10 million empire on one simple belief - attention is more powerful than truth. From screening pornos above a Wimbledon pub to representing Frank Sinatra, Muhammad Ali and OJ Simpson, Clifford climbed as high as you can go. Until Operation Yewtree came knocking… This one's got everything. Sex, lies, tabloids, corruption and a ending you couldn't make up. This is a Depressed CEO deep dive. ------------- Thanks for listening make sure you follow us on our socials. Sign up to our Patreon where members get an exclusive extra monthly episode plus bonus content. ------------- Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/depressedceospodcast Link Tree: https://linktr.ee/depressedceospodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.