Published by Mark Thompson
“What You Do” is a podcast dedicated to introducing you to people you don’t know, who do unusually interesting things. This is comedy and compelling conversation packed into one.
Listen on Apple Podcasts1 hr 17 min
Have you ever seen a bear in a car who knows how to blow the horn? Didn’t think so, and the new trend in weddings is to skip the big expensive ordeal. It seems people are choosing pets over kids, and boomers are opting out of downsizing, and instead buying bigger homes later in life. Are movie theaters back in fashion, and the number of American citizens who shoplift is growing. Stick shift cars are on the way out, plus were now finding out why mimes are scary. How would you like a raccoon for a pet? Robo taxis are out performing human drivers, plus are your sleep habits weird? I give you the top 8 cheeses, plus what businesses are fading out, and we close it out with a woman on a cruise ship was using her dinner fork to scratch her feet, then continued to eat her meal with the same fork. What’s weird about that? Join in and see.
1 hr 12 min
Take a guess how much an Ohtani baseball card sold for, along with Luke Skywalker’s original lightsaber. What’s the craziest thing you saw someone do on an airplane, plus doctors say cosmetic procedures are as addictive as gambling. The older generation views going broke as worse than dying. Grieving pet owners are turning to AI, and the question that can’t be answered, should you reunite with your ex? All will be revealed; this way please.
1 hr 12 min
More and more people are moving back in with their parents, plus I give you the latest most popular dog breeds, and it seems people prefer negotiating with women. I give you the power of a compliment, and a live bear broke into an occupied hotel room. What are the most stressed cities in America, and who serves the best fast food French fries. Listening won’t kill you!
1 hr 2 min
A two-thousand-pound sea otter caused a ruckus in Tasmania, and what unhealthy habit did you quit? The success of your relationship depends on how you both smell, and nearly half of married couples hide money from each other. If you drop something in the toilet, don’t try to retrieve it. A man is suing draft kings because he lost everything, plus July means ice cream, and there is a brand-new flavor. Apparently, even good lies are bad, plus a woman found a new place to store her wine, which appears to be the latest thing. You probably have nothing better to do, so join us.
58 min
You won’t believe the stuff people found in a friend’s car, and 44% of Americans don’t have a romantic partner, nor do they plan to get one. I give you the top 5 best hamburgers in America, plus a man recently discovered his fiancé has serious tax troubles, and the wedding is just around the corner. The cops pulled over a woman who claims she doesn’t have to follow the law because she is a sovereign citizen. When you have a serious water problem, do what the metro station did; call in the beavers. And finally, you can now buy an AI toilet that comes to you, but it’s going to cost you. How can you not?
1 hr 19 min
Today I give you a mother who overstepped her boundaries, and boy did she, plus a 37-year-old woman who posed as a 12-year-old for years, and if you want to make more money at your new job, stay silent during your interview. Louisiana gives us a story that has a gator in it; plus are grandparents being misused as a free babysitting service? Nasa is making clean drinking water out of human doo doo, and if you take Ozempic, watch out for your ears. How do you tell your spouse that they are fat, and how do you tell a friend they stink? It’s all here, and it’s free.
1 hr 13 min
Details of cigar shop speaking event, plus what’s the most unusual thing you’ve witnessed someone do on an airplane, and what is the #1 thing that flight attendants wish people would stop doing? A Florida man shows his neighbors too much of himself, and when did you realize that you are too old to party? Who is the cheapest person you know, and what makes them cheap, plus what are the strangest things that Uber riders have left behind. A woman found that the best place to dance is in the middle of the road after cops have pulled her over. I have the top 10 cheeses, and I’m not kidding, plus I give you another scam to avert when you are filling up with gas. My favorite story is of man who won over 5 million in the lottery and his parents demanded half of it. The party is just beginning, and you’re not too old to join in!
1 hr 25 min
A grocery shopper bought a bag of lettuce and found a live frog in the bag; also, did you choose the right person to marry? A lot of us didn’t. Social media is as harmful as smoking plus, 90% of us are right handed, and science says they know why. A Chicago man stole a police car while the cops watched, and some athletes say no to Gatorade and yes to pickle juice. A man is suing Carnival cruise lines because he says the deck was too hot, plus, what’s the creepiest thing a woman ever said to you? And a dog accidentally fired a shot gun and hit a woman in the arm. Pretty good aim if you ask me. We’ve got a seat for you!
1 hr 16 min
A Michigan woman shop lifted a bottle of wine, and take a guess where she hid it. Self-driving Waymo cars have been showing up in one particular neighborhood, and residents are pissed, plus, have you heard of Ozempic personality? It’s a real thing. You won’t believe what a food delivery guy did, and I think it’s illegal, and apparently, moms are sick and tired and they want a food divorce. A semi-trailer truck was hauling 25 million bees; do I need to say more? And this may sound strange, but pot can help you lose weight. When is it considered rude to have your wedding, and what’s something most people find attractive, but you don’t?! Listen in to find out.
1 hr 8 min
A mom’s teenage son has refused to shower, and the stench is tough to be around. What is a tell-tale sign a marriage isn’t going to make it, and have you ever heard of a cosmetic cauliflower ear? Guys are getting surgery to have that look. A man faked being blind for years and received VA benefits; guess where he is. Plus power walking washes your brain. Is Chipotle skimping on your order, plus a McDonalds employee was caught putting fries in her mouth, then putting them back in the serving box; and surprisingly, she no longer works there. Welcome in!
1 hr 5 min
What would you do if a $1200 drone landed in your backyard? Clearly, you would set it on fire. I give you the latest on the hantavirus, and did you know chimps can predict the weather? Two pilots have been grounded because they were drawing penises in the sky. Real estate prices are coming down, and a man is in jail because he tried to claim ownership of a boat in honor of Donald Trump. It appears you can’t smoke pot in your home anymore if you live next to this woman, and you won’t believe what they found in the throat of a Chinese dude.
1 hr 1 min
A cop car raced a civilian while on duty, and he’s in trouble? We celebrate our moms today, and what’s the weirdest thing you witnessed someone eat? A cat got stuck in a recliner chair because he didn’t want to go to the vet, plus another idiot stole a fire truck, so guess where he is. A teenager was caught licking straws and putting them back in the straw dispenser because he thought it was funny for his social media; he’s facing jail time. And a dude went all in to collect his deceased sister’s inheritance, and what he did is insane. Join in!
1 hr 8 min
Who wants to buy the Scarface mansion? It’s available. Did you hear the one about the gator who checks in at the bank? Plus, ghosting shitty friends is all the rage. Las Vegas is saying goodbye to an old friend, and I give you the ultimate way to spoil your dog. I pose the question, what is your most irrational fear, and beware of pump switching, which is a real thing. I give you the case of the curious cabinets, and then I wrap it up with the top five worst songs by actors.
1 hr 24 min
Want to sleep better? Put your phone away; way away. Did you hear? Coachella was making people sick with $25 dollar slices of pizza, and driving a Toyota Supra does not give you permission to go 123 mph. A woman was accidentally paid $20,000 by mistake, and she tried to keep it. Wanna start your day off right? Take a walk first thing in the morning, plus a woman trashed a Subway restaurant because they didn’t put peppers on her sandwich. How did you accidentally discover your spouse was cheating on you? And guess where people at Coachella chose to do the nasty. A woman couldn’t get in touch with her grandmother so she called the police, and you’ll never guess what the grandmother was doing. How many times should you use your towel before grabbing a fresh one? And a giant chunk of ice came crashing through a family’s roof. What would you do? All will be revealed, so jump in!
1 hr 21 min
Today I give you the top 10 worst songs by actors, and winning a 167 million in the lottery won’t save you from being a pig. A guy was shot by his own dog, and the cops don’t seem to buy it, plus a guy stole a 30-ton excavator which took him straight to jail. If all humans disappeared from the earth, which animal species would rule, and rage booking is all the rage. She tried to pull one over on the government and it didn’t work, plus what’s something no one can change your opinion about. How do you feel when someone says you look great for your age, plus do you have tech neck? We’re hitting the hard stuff this week.
1 hr 1 min
A female sheriff deputy has resigned because she was selling foot fetish porn online, and what is something you tried once and will never do again? What is the perfect fast-food meal, plus, is being filthy rich morally wrong? Are you a conversation narcissist, and many cities that young people visit during spring break have had it up to here, and they’re saying, “don’t come here.” Are engagement rings worth it, plus how would you like to sleep in a bed while flying, because now you can. And like most of us, a 15-year-old kid stole a city bus and picked up his girlfriend from school. This and more are yours with the touch of a finger; or “fanger” as they say in the south; not judging!
1 hr 11 min
Syrup and the 10 freeway don’t go together; that has now been proven. Remember the Galaxy trifold phone? No one else does either, and here’s some good advice, do not offer a cash tip to a judge, especially when the money is counterfeit. Have you ever tried goat yoga? No, then how about snake yoga? And if you have a cat, make sure you know where your hair ties are at all times. If you enjoy listening to your devices without headphones on air flights, then you shouldn’t fly United, plus fast-food chains have been ranked, and I have the results. Do you take medication for irritable bowel syndrome? Then don’t let the cops see it, and a guy stole someone’s septic tank; which begs the question, why would anyone do that? It’s your lucky day, the federal government is about to release secret files about aliens, and what’s the dumbest way you have been injured. It’s hard to believe, but I have all these answers.
1 hr 53 min
A woman freaks out when she discovers how many women her boyfriend had slept with, and would you like to improve your sleep? Stop scrolling on social media hours before bed. A guy smashes into a parked cop car because he was watching Youtube on his phone, plus what are the greatest moments in your life? I’ll give you other people’s top 10. Would you buy a house that doesn’t come with a bedroom? As a population, we’ve apparently had it with tipping; I know I have. When you travel, which item do you think has the most germs, and a woman was found in a stranger’s home wearing no pants and eating fruity pebbles. Did you know annoying people in your life are aging you? I give you the top 5 happiest cities in the US, and least happy. People stealing from hotels is rampant, and a man went to the hospital because he woke up and discovered he was completely blue. There is a major breakthrough for people with OCD, and a major movie prop is up for auction. Alrighty then! What’s the dumbest way you’ve injured yourself? Plus, a man sued a Mexican restaurant because the salsa was too spicy. We’re waiting for you!
1 hr 30 min
Breakfast at Denny’s apparently comes with an unwanted side of sausage, and what wedding moment screamed the couple isn’t going to last? Plus, the cost of owning a car is exploding, and golf cart crashes are rampant in Florida. Did you know camels have beauty pageants? And camels cheating is rampant. If you want a clean airline seat, you’re going to have to pay for it. Hey guys, there’s a new thing called Baldmaxx, and some men are loving it, plus Cracker Barrel has seen better days and they clearly don’t know how to fix it. Ladies, what’s the one thing you wish guys would stop doing, plus, I give you the best and worst states for women. Britney Spears has seen better days, and her family is worried, plus have you heard of the friendship shelf theory? It’s stupid and so is this show.
1 hr 28 min
Would you drink water from your toilet bowl? Many people are lining up to do exactly that. I give you the most annoying traits of a backseat driver, and a naked man stole an ambulance and there was a patient on the gurney in the back, who wasn’t naked. Fan voting is under way for the rock and roll hall of fame and I give you the top 5 so far, and details on a delivery robot who goes rogue and tears up parts of a neighborhood. A guy won the lottery using the birthday numbers from members of his family, and those family members want him to share the money with them, and he said nope. What’s something you judged people for until it happened to you, and some women are cleaning their panties in the coffee makers in hotel rooms, and yes, you heard that right. What’s a decision you made in ten seconds that changed your life, plus a man burned his house down trying to kill spiders, which certainly did the job. And lastly, a woman has reappeared after going missing for 24 years, and she doesn’t want anything to do with her family. Ah yes, it’s great to be alive.