Published by Alexa Andre - Sexologist and Relationship Expert
The no-bullshit sex and relationship podcast where sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) says everything you're too afraid to. Stop having mediocre sex and level up your game! 🎧 New episodes every week.
Listen on Apple Podcasts1 hr 4 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Carly, founder of Read Aurore, to talk about why written erotica is becoming one of the most powerful tools for pleasure, communication and self-discovery. Together they explore how true erotic stories differ from fantasy, why women are increasingly choosing erotica over visual porn, the psychology behind imagination and desire, how writing about sex can help process emotions and improve communication, and how reading erotica can inspire better sex and stronger relationships. Topics discussed: Carly's path to creating Aurora Erotica Interviewing strangers about sex Dating in Europe vs New York Vacation confidence and sexual freedom Why true stories are hotter than fantasy Turning real experiences into erotica Writing as emotional processing First-time sex that is actually good Why men should read erotica Women's real sexual desires Affairs and taboo fantasies Open relationships vs secret affair How Aurore selects submissions Writing as therapy Rewriting difficult experiences Smut vs erotica Romance vs erotica The decline in Gen Z sexual activity Benefits of reading erotica Benefits of writing erotica Reliving pleasurable experiences Reading erotica together as foreplay Follow Carly:Instagram: @readaurore Website: readaurore.com Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2629-alexa
1 hr 3 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with clinical psychologist and relationship coach Gaby Balsells to unpack one of the hardest questions in love: how do you know whether to stay in a relationship or walk away? Together they explore: how to tell the difference between a temporary rough patch and true incompatibility the danger of ignoring red flags during the honeymoon phase emotional vs. sexual compatibility settling vs. honoring your needs trusting your desires healthy communication overcoming defensiveness becoming "us vs. the problem” emotional labor the initiator/receiver dynamic why actions matter more than words consistency over empty promises repairing conflict, couples therapy, sexual compatibility, mismatched libidos & feeling desired knowing when you've waited long enough guilt around leaving selective effort & weaponized incompetence and why love alone isn't always enough Follow Gaby:Instagram: @gabybalsells Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa
57 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with urologist Dr. Jed Kaminet sky to unpack everything you need to know about men's sexual health: from vasectomies, erectile dysfunction, testosterone, fertility, sperm count, pornography, performance anxiety, lifestyle habits, microplastics, prostate health, post-nut clarity, and why great sex is about so much more than penetration. In this episode, Dr. Jed shares insights from performing over 6,000 vasectomies , explains why vasectomies don't affect erections, orgasms, ejaculation, libido, or masculinity, and discusses who should (and shouldn't) get one. We also dive into why more young men are experiencing erectile dysfunction, the difference between psychological and physical ED, performance anxiety, refractory periods, Viagra vs. Cialis, low testosterone, healthy ways to increase testosterone naturally, pornography's impact on arousal, penis pumps and rings, fertility, declining sperm counts, microplastics, prostate health, ejaculation frequency, steroids, testosterone therapy, men's fears around penis size, micro-penis stigma, post-nut clarity and more. Topics discussed: Dr. Jed's experience performing 6,000+ vasectomies Why vasectomies don't affect erections, orgasms, ejaculation or libido Who should and shouldn't get a vasectomy Vasectomy reversals and success rates More childfree men choosing vasectomies Psychological vs. physical erectile dysfunction Performance anxiety and first-time sex nerves What erectile dysfunction actually means Lifestyle causes of ED (sleep, obesity, smoking, alcohol, exercise) Stress, anxiety and blood flow to the penis Refractory periods and why they change with age Viagra, Cialis and how they work Daily Cialis vs. as-needed dosing Testosterone testing and common misconceptions Natural ways to increase testosterone Weightlifting vs. endurance running for hormone health Penis pumps and cock rings Pornography, masturbation habits and sexual conditioning Low libido vs. erectile dysfunction Fertility, declining sperm counts and modern lifestyle Microplastics and male fertility Sauna use, heat exposure and sperm health Prostate enlargement, prostate cancer and ejaculation research Steroids, bodybuilding and infertility Testosterone replacement therapy risks Women's testosterone and libido Post-nut clarity explained Why men's physiology isn't an excuse to neglect a partner's orgasm Communication, sex therapy and relationship dynamics Micro-penis myths and penis size insecurity Why erectile dysfunction is a symptom, not a disease Follow Dr. Jed:Instagram: @drjedkaminetsky Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2629-alexa
56 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with Coral Osborne (@theunrealcoralosborne), sexologist, intimacy coach for men, former sex worker, and writer. Coral shares how sex work has changed over the last decade, why the industry has become increasingly polarized, and why she believes decriminalization matters for safety and autonomy. She opens up about the realities behind influencer culture, escorting, OnlyFans, AI, the loneliness epidemic, and why becoming a content creator today is harder than ever. The conversation takes a deeply personal turn as Coral recounts hiring a male escort, what she hoped to experience, why it didn't unfold as expected, and what the experience revealed about vulnerability, performance, pleasure, and intimacy. Topics discussed: The changing landscape of sex work over the past decade Political divides and hypocrisy within the sex industry Escort culture in Los Angeles, New York, Dubai, and Las Vegas Why older sex workers often earn more than younger ones The rise of OnlyFans and if it’s easy to become a millionaire The loneliness epidemic and why AI won't replace real intimacy Building an audience on social media without sacrificing integrity Writing vulnerable essays on Substack Why Coral hired a male escort What it felt like to be on the client side of sex work Performance anxiety from a woman's perspective Receiving versus giving pleasure Faking orgasms and learning how to stop performing Oral sex, vulnerability, and intimacy Dating after leaving sex work Meeting her current boyfriend and navigating honesty early on Why intimacy and transaction can coexist Double standards around dating former sex workers Lived experience versus academic credentials in sex education Why coaches should continue investing in their own healing Using relationship tools like Yes/No/Maybe lists and relationship menus Bringing curiosity and intentional communication into long-term relationships Follow Coral Osborne:Instagram: @theunrealcoralosborne Substack: https://substack.com/@coralosborne Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa
51 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets back in bed with sex educator, relationship coach, and OnlyFans creator Ashley Manta for a deep dive into pussy worship, oral sex, receiving pleasure, and what truly creates incredible sex. They discuss what pussy worship actually means, why enthusiasm and verbal reassurance matter and creating safety for the receiver. Topics covered: What pussy worship really is Why enthusiasm changes everything Verbal reassurance before oral sex Creating emotional safety during sex The ideal 60-minute pussy worship session Foreplay being needed before oral sex Labia massage techniques Consent before penetration Pleasure-focused vs orgasm-focused sex Tension orgasms vs relaxed orgasms Betty Dodson's orgasm techniques Breathing through orgasm Why sex educators have higher standards Escaping performative sex Raising your standards for pleasure Porn vs real-life sex Learning to receive instead of always giving Overcoming people-pleasing in bed Mutual masturbation as education Giving and receiving feedback during sex Hormonal changes and changing preferences Pussy worship fantasies Bisexual experiences and women's play parties Breast worship and body worship Toys during oral and hand sex Why everyone should use lube Oral-anal hygiene tips Choosing partners who prioritize your pleasure Follow Ashley Manta:Instagram: @cannasexual Website: pussywhisperer.coach Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2629-alexa
41 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Vee and Elle from the Girls Gone Deep podcast for Part 2/2. Together they explore whether non-monogamy is really about unmet needs, what happens when a partner satisfies nearly everything you're looking for, the role of new relationship energy in long-term relationships, primary partnerships versus non-hierarchical polyamory, freedom and autonomy in love, catching feelings for people who aren't a match, maintaining boundaries despite intense attraction, and the science behind oxytocin, dopamine, attachment, and post-sex bonding. They also unpack cream pies, breeding kinks, ownership versus feeling chosen, BDSM dynamics, worship, possessiveness, fertility awareness methods, Oura Ring tracking, vasectomies, accidental pregnancy stories, relationship satisfaction, energetic pleasure, arousal, and what it really means to build a "bulletproof pussy." Topics Discussed Whether non-monogamy is fundamentally about unmet needs Can one person satisfy all your emotional, sexual, and relational needs? New relationship energy (NRE) and its role in long-term relationships Catching feelings for people who aren't a good match Oxytocin, dopamine, endorphins, and attachment after sex Bacterial vaginosis (BV): causes, treatment, recurrence, and prevention Yeast infections and recurring vaginal health issues Gut health's connection to vaginal health Creating a “bulletproof pussy” Sleep, alcohol, drugs and sex UTIs and post-sex hygiene Self-checking vaginal health through scent and taste Cream pies, breeding kinks, and why people find them attractive Accidental pregnancy stories Ownership, possessiveness, worship, and feeling chosen BDSM dynamics and core desires in sex Follow Girls Gone Deep:Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa
45 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Vee and Elle from the Girls Gone Deep podcast for an honest conversation about sexuality, identity, motherhood, non-monogamy, desire, dating, pleasure, and why "sluthood" has nothing to do with how much sex you're having. Together they explore whether you can still be a slut while celibate, the difference between sex positivity and sluthood, and why owning your desires without shame is at the heart of sexual empowerment. Topics Covered: • Why "sluthood" is a mindset, not a body count• Sex positivity vs. sluthood• Owning sexual desires and boundaries• Polyamory and relationship de-escalation• Solo poly life and finding a new primary partner• BDSM dynamics, D/s relationships, and sexual compatibility• Playing together vs. playing separately in non-monogamous relationships• Feeling sexually satiated in long-term partnerships• Asexuality, demisexuality, and the ace spectrum• Whether you can be an asexual slut• Anonymous sex vs. sex with emotional connection• Sex parties and sex-positive communities• Building trust, safety, and desire with recurring partners• Female arousal, nervous system safety, and orgasm• Why one pregnancy can feel completely different from another• Postpartum sexuality and loss of desire• Returning to sex after giving birth• Masturbation during pregnancy and postpartum• First postpartum orgasms and sexual rediscovery• Oral sex, receiving pleasure, and people-pleasing tendencies• Why some women struggle to receive• "Real eaters" and enthusiastic oral sex partners• The psychology of receiving pleasure• The Wheel of Consent• Foreplay, full-body arousal, and erotic anticipation• Female desire and what actually creates arousal• Grinding, making out, and erotic tension• Bad kissers and sexual compatibility• What makes oral sex feel incredible• Leaving casual sex behind• Dating with intention• Childfree dating and relationship dealbreaker• Having sex on the first date• Slow burns versus instant chemistry• Building tension before sex• Boundaries, self-control, and emotional attachment• Future sexual adventures and lifestyle goals Follow Girls Gone Deep:Instagram: @girlsgonedeeppod Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2624-alexa
56 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with porn historian, writer, and adult industry expert Noelle Perdue for a fascinating conversation about pornography, fantasy, sexuality, kink, technology, trauma, aging, relationships, and the hidden ways porn shapes our world. Noelle shares her unlikely journey from software developer to porn scriptwriter, her work with Pornhub and the adult industry, and why she believes pornography is one of the most misunderstood cultural forces of our time. Together, Alexa and Noelle unpack the relationship between porn and real-life sexuality, whether porn influences behavior, the myths surrounding porn addiction, the role of fantasy, kink exploration, sex education, censorship, free speech, technology, consent, and how pornography impacts legislation, culture, and online platforms. The conversation also explores giantess fetishism, size kink culture, porn parodies, queer sexuality, healing after sexual trauma, alternative forms of intimacy, body image, aging, MILF culture, hookup communication, sex work, human trafficking misconceptions, and why people are often far more sexually diverse than they realize. Whether you're curious about porn's role in society, interested in sexual exploration, or simply want a deeper understanding of human desire, this episode offers an honest, nuanced, and thought-provoking perspective. Topics discussed: • How Noelle became a porn historian• Leaving tech to write porn scripts• Writing porn parodies for major studios• Working with Brazzers and Pornhub• Pornography's influence on technology and culture• Section 230 explained• FOSTA-SESTA and online censorship• Sex work vs. human trafficking• Porn and free speech debates• Does porn affect relationships?• Porn addiction and dependency myths• Porn as a tool for exploration• Why porn should not replace sex education• Fantasy vs. reality in sexual desire• The dangers of using porn as sex ed• Giantess fetish and SizeCon• Expansion fetishes and breast expansion• Vore and consumption fantasies• Alternative forms of intimacy• Expansive definitions of sex• Communicating desires with partners• Casual sex and queer relationship dynamics• Why sexual communication matters• The popularity of MILF content• Body diversity in porn• Criticisms of pornography• The "teen" category debate• Pornography as a reflection of culture• Sexual violence and porn studies• Gooning culture explained Follow Noelle:Instagram: @all_day_breakfast_ Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa
55 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with sex educator Tara Michaela for a nuanced conversation about the ethics of public sex, public play, PDA, kink visibility, consent, social norms, and why society struggles to define where the line actually is. Together they unpack whether public sexuality is inherently unethical, why people are drawn to public play and exhibitionism, the role of novelty and desire, and how context changes our perception of what's acceptable. They explore everything from making out in public, wearable vibrators, public bathrooms, sex in cars, beach hookups, PDA at parties, BDSM at Pride, leash dynamics in public spaces, sex-positive parenting, children witnessing nontraditional expressions of sexuality, consent education, sex negativity, and the difference between legality and ethics. They also discuss whether bystanders can truly consent to what they encounter in public, how social norms shape our reactions to sexuality, why people react so strongly online, how consent is often taught as a black-and-white concept despite living in gray areas, and why intent and impact both matter in conversations about consent violations. Topics discussed: • public sex vs. public play • PDA, making out, and cultural attitudes toward affection • Why public play is exciting and appealing • Novelty, desire, exhibitionism, and fantasy fulfillment • Wearable vibrators and remote-control sex toys in public • The ethics of public sexual behavior • Consent and uninvolved bystanders • Social norms versus personal freedom • The difference between legality and morality • Being the "naked neighbor" and visibility at home • BDSM visibility in public spaces • Kink at Pride and public kink discourse • Walking a submissive on a leash in public • Public conversations about sex and sexual experiences • Elevator conversations, social etiquette, and discomfort • Consent education and its limitations • Intent versus impact in consent violations • Ethical gray areas in sexuality • Sex on the beach and secluded public spaces • Sex in cars and privacy expectations • Public bathrooms and ethical considerations • PDA at parties, raves, and social gatherings • Exhibitionism and safer alternatives • Sex parties and kink events as consensual spaces • Online outrage and reactions to sexual content • How sexuality can challenge and change social norms Follow Tara: Instagram: @yourexgirlfriendtara Follow Alexa Andre: Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2624-alexa
57 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre (@sexwithalexa) gets in bed with Norma Buster, sex positive victims rights advocate, Chief of Staff at CA Goldberg Law, survivor of image-based abuse, and online sex worker, for a raw and nuanced conversation about stalking, leaked intimate images, deepfake abuse, consent, shame, sexuality, healing, OnlyFans, bisexuality, and reclaiming agency after trauma. Topics Covered: Norma Buster’s experience with stalking and image-based abuse Why “revenge porn” is an inaccurate and harmful term The evolution of image-based sexual abuse laws Victim blaming from judges, police, and society Trauma, shame, and psychological impact after leaked intimate images CA Goldberg Law and victims rights advocacy The federal Take It Down Act Why intent-to-harm clauses make prosecutions harder Free speech debates surrounding image-based abuse laws AI deepfakes and nudifying apps Deepfake abuse affecting women, minors, and students Consent, impact vs intent, and digital privacy Supporting friends through stalking or abuse Victim vs survivor terminology and trauma identity Purity culture and sexual shame Bisexual awakening during the pandemic Dating couples and exploring non-monogamy Threesomes and alternative relationship dynamics Healing through sexuality and sex positivity Starting an OnlyFans after surviving image-based abuse Sex work stigma and online identity Reclaiming agency and personal autonomy Advice for survivors struggling with shame and harassment Follow Norma Buster:Instagram: @normabuster_ CA Goldberg Law: cagoldberglaw.com Follow Alexa Andre:Instagram: @sexwithalexa Patreon: https://patreon.com/sexwithalexa Sponsor: Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2619-alexa
59 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with hypnotherapist, content creator, and non-monogamy advocate Kate Shelor for an unfiltered conversation about open relationships, outsourcing fantasies, emotional labor in swinging, and the surprising ways long-term couples keep intimacy exciting. Kate opens up about why she rarely dates outside her marriage despite being ethically non-monogamous, how hiring sex workers simplified their relationship dynamic, and the realities of jealousy, chemistry, group play, and sexual compatibility. They also dive into anal sex, fantasies, OnlyFans attention, emotional burnout, aging, confidence, kink exploration, and the difference between fantasy and real-life sex. Topics covered: Ethical non-monogamy & swinging Why Kate rarely wants other partners Being a sex educator while dating Being intimidating or “unapproachable” Emotional labor in open relationships Using escorts and sex workers as a couple Negotiating fantasies and boundaries Why paying for sex can be simpler than dating Outsourcing anal and mismatched sexual interests Jealousy, communication, and trust in marriage Male vs female sex workers Exploring kinks safely Why group sex stopped being exciting Realistic female orgasms vs porn fantasy Aging, hormones, and changing libido OnlyFans, validation, and sexual attention online Keeping long-term relationships exciting Matching underwear subscriptions Cruise playrooms and glory hole adventures Novelty, intimacy, and maintaining attraction
43 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with… herself for a raw, unfiltered solo episode catching you up on everything from life on a Temptation Cruise to her evolving dating standards, sexual boundaries, and relationship mindset. Alexa shares what it’s like attending a Temptation/Desire-style cruise solo for the first time (people-watching couples, navigating swinger culture, and breaking down exactly how playrooms, workshops, and non-monogamous dynamics work in real life). She dives into her personal shift away from casual sex and into intentional dating, explaining why she’s now prioritizing emotional connection, aftercare, and partners who genuinely meet her needs, especially when it comes to oral sex. The episode explores deeper questions around monogamy vs. non-monogamy, whether one partner can meet all your needs, and how exposure to different relationship styles can expand your perspective, whether you ever practice them or not. She also shares behind-the-scenes insights into her workshops, from pussy worship to anal education, and what it’s like teaching pleasure in a fully immersive, hands-on environment. Topics Covered Swinger cruise culture: Temptation & Desire breakdown Playroom rules, dynamics, and etiquette Workshops: pussy worship, anal 101, handjob techniques Observing newbies vs experienced couples in non-monogamy Community, connection, and friendships on lifestyle cruises Using pleasure and joy as a form of balance in a difficult world Transition from casual sex to intentional dating Sexual dissatisfaction and unmet needs in casual dynamics The importance of oral sex and prioritizing female pleasure The orgasm gap and stimulation differences during penetration “Real eater only” mindset and not settling sexually Monogamy vs non-monogamy reflections Fluid relationship identities and changing over time Learning from different relationship structures Expanding social circles: queer, kinky, celibate, non-monogamous perspectives Masturbation and solo pleasure practices Behind-the-scenes of sex workshops and teaching live experiences STI education gaps and common fears Orgies, private room dynamics, and cruise experiences Community vs sex focus in lifestyle spaces Building a career as a sex educator and coach Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2619-alexa Temptation Cruises Info Desire Cruises Info
57 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with Ashley Manta to explore the world of energetic sex: what it is, how it works, and whether you can actually feel pleasure, connection, or even orgasm without physical touch. They break down the concept of the energetic body vs the physical body, how breath, presence, and visualization play a role in directing energy, and how practices rooted in tantra, mindfulness, and somatic awareness can expand what we think of as sex. Ashley explains how energy can be shared between partners (with consent), how couples can sync breath and build intimacy without touch, and how techniques like eye gazing, chakra visualization, and intention-setting are used in workshops. The conversation covers everything from solo exploration to partnered experiences like “energetic penetration,” heart-to-heart connection exercises, and combining touch with energy to enhance sensation. They also discuss real workshop experiences where beginners reported feeling physical sensations, emotional releases, and even orgasms while fully clothed. Topics discussed: What “energetic sex” is Energetic body vs physical body Breathwork and presence in sexual experiences Visualization and directing energy Solo energetic pleasure practices Partnered energetic connection Eye gazing and breath syncing Chakra system and energy movement Hand energy exercise (feeling energy between palms) Energetic “penetration” concept Combining physical touch with energy Workshop experiences and beginner reactions Reports of no-touch orgasms Emotional and somatic responses (shaking, release) Building confidence in energetic practices Energetic kink and power dynamics Energetic restraint and roleplay Tuning into a partner’s “frequency” Feedback cues and responsiveness Breath orgasms vs other orgasm types Laughgasms, coregasms, and non-traditional orgasms Expanding definitions of pleasure Self-pleasure and manifestation practices Using orgasmic energy for intention-setting Longer orgasm experiences Tantra workshops and festivals Tantric massage (what it may involve) Skepticism vs openness Long-distance energetic connection Phone sex using energy and visualization Alexa’s personal experiment and results
51 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with Star Stone to unpack her real-life experience inside OneTaste, the controversial “orgasmic meditation” (OM) community often described as a sex cult. Star shares how she was drawn in while searching for better sex and multiple orgasms, what “OMing” actually is, and how quickly curiosity turned into something much more complex. From communal living and blurred consent to coercion, confusion, and trauma bonding, this episode dives deep into the psychological dynamics of cult-like environments and how they operate under the guise of empowerment and sexual wellness. We talk about why people join, how boundaries get blurry, what makes leaving so difficult, and what healing looked like afterward. Star also opens up about rebuilding her relationship to sex, safety, and intimacy after the experience. We also cover the recent sentencing of OneTaste founder Nicole Daedone and what accountability, justice, and systemic change actually look like in cases like this. Topics covered: How Star first discovered OneTaste What “orgasmic meditation” actually is and how it works Wanting to become multi-orgasmic and seeking better sex The structure of OM classes and partner pairing Why the first experience didn’t work but still hooked her Moving into communal “OM houses” Sharing beds with strangers and lack of privacy House rules and daily OM expectations Confusion as a control tactic in cult dynamics Pressure to override boundaries and say yes Consent vs coercion in group environments “Lean into discomfort” and loss of autonomy Sexual dynamics, power, and unsafe partner experiences Trauma bonding and cycles of abuse Why it’s hard to leave cult-like environments The role of belonging, community, and vulnerability Leaving the house vs leaving the organization Therapy, treatment, and understanding narcissistic abuse Processing trauma through art, comedy, and storytelling Life after OneTaste and rebuilding sexual safety How the experience impacted her sex life and relationships Learning boundaries, discernment, and partner selection Moving to Costa Rica for healing and nervous system reset Writing and performing her one-woman show Humor as a tool for processing trauma Cult psychology and why smart people still join Justice vs systemic change in cases of sexual exploitation At the time of this episode, Star chose not to speak in detail about the legal case. However, here are the key verified facts: Nicole Daedone was sentenced to 9 years in federal prison in March 2026 for forced labor conspiracy Co-defendant Rachel Cherwitz received 78 months (6.5 years) Prosecutors said the organization used psychological, emotional, and financial coercion Victims were allegedly pressured into unpaid labor and sexual acts with clients or investors The court ordered $12 million in forfeiture and nearly $900,000 in restitution to victims The case followed a five-week federal trial in 2025 If you want to read more: DOJ sentencing announcement Guardian coverage of the case Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2615-alexa
56 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) sits down with sex therapist and author Ian Kerner to break down what’s really going on in your sex life, starting with one simple question: “So tell me about the last time you had sex.” From there, they unpack the patterns most couples fall into and why sex often becomes routine, disconnected, or unsatisfying over time. This episode dives into the hidden dynamics behind desire, communication, and intimacy and how to actually fix them. They cover: sex scripts and why most people follow the same predictable pattern spontaneous vs responsive desire and why mismatched libidos happen why initiation often fails (and creates rejection cycles) obligation sex vs genuinely wanting it the role of foreplay, arousal, and why rushing to penetration backfires the orgasm gap and importance of clitoral stimulation why couples stop prioritizing sex in long-term relationships communication struggles and how to actually say what you want turning complaints into clear desires building anticipation, tension, and erotic connection practical tools like the “willingness window” how to create better sex through intention, not just chemistry
1 hr 0 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with comedian Tina Friml to talk about: Growing up with cerebral palsy and dating insecurities Becoming a successful comedian even without a drivers license Bullying around desirability and sex Having sex for the first time at 26 Slow burn vs instant chemistry in dating Navigating ambiguity and attraction Making dates go to her comedy shows Using comedy to express kinks and boundaries Bad sex due to lack of communication/understanding Polyamory vs monogamy experiences Sex parties and exploration Discovering a love for restraint and being tied up (Shibari) Sex toys and accessibility issues Misconceptions about disabled people being non-sexual Emotional labor of making others comfortable Rejection and people avoiding honesty Green flags in dating disabled people Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beduc.at/pd2615-alexa
58 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with kink performer, educator, and co-founder of Hit Me Up , Hawthorne , to talk about the future of sex, switches, kink exploration, nipple clamps, and the very real phenomenon of post-nut clarity. We get into how sex parties are evolving beyond just hooking up, and why community might be the most important part of modern sexuality . From mixers and workshops to co-working spaces (yes, really), we explore how people are using these environments to build real connections, not just get laid. We also talk about: Why community comes before sex (and how that changes everything) How kink and non-monogamy have become more visible The rise of switches and why rigid dom/sub roles are fading What people still get wrong about power dynamics Post-nut clarity , what actually happens psychologically and physically after orgasm, and why so many people completely drop the ball right after they come Why private orgies > big parties (sometimes) How to approach people at events without being weird The reality of running a sex party business Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beducate.me/pd2610-alexa
57 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with sex therapist and relationship coach Gaby Balsells to talk about emotional connection: what it actually means, why it matters, and how it directly impacts your sex life. From feeling “seen, heard, and safe” to understanding why some people need emotional connection before sex (and others after), this episode breaks down the real dynamics behind intimacy, desire, and long-term connection. Alexa and Gaby explore how disconnection happens (even in good relationships) and how couples can rebuild it through communication, attunement, and intentional effort. They also unpack why relying on your partner as your only emotional outlet can kill attraction, and how having a “menu” of support systems actually strengthens your relationship. In this episode, we cover: What emotional connection actually means Emotional vs physical connection and how they influence each other Why some people need sex to feel emotionally connected Why emotional safety is the foundation for intimacy Reconnecting after a fight (without forcing sex) Meeting your partner in the middle instead of rejecting bids for connection Expanding your “menu” of emotional support beyond your partner Why relying on your partner for everything kills attraction How to feel connected again when life gets busy Weekly check-ins and “heart to heart” conversations The importance of non-sexual touch Appreciation, praise, and feeling seen in relationships Creating novelty (why hotel sex hits different) Why good sex doesn’t equal emotional connection Resentment as the biggest relationship killer One-sided effort and what to do when your partner isn’t trying “We accept the love we think we deserve” Outgrowing relationships and evolving needs How to know if a relationship is worth saving Dating tips to assess emotional compatibility early Why safety is essential — even in casual sex Attunement: the sexiest relationship skill Thank you to the best waterproof sex blanket in the market, Splash Blanket for keeping me and my guests dry and cozy ◡̈
54 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with comedian, podcaster, and host of The Manwhore Podcast , Billy Procida , to talk about humor in dating and relationships and why so many men feel the need to be the funniest person you’ve ever met. From prank culture to competitive humor between partners, Billy and Alexa unpack the difference between being funny, being fun, and trying way too hard . They discuss why some people struggle to accept being the “joke receiver,” why men can feel threatened by funny women, and why humor can help smooth conflict. In this episode we cover: Why humor matters in relationships The difference between being funny vs being fun Why trying to be funny often backfires Men feeling pressure to be the funniest person in the room Why some men get uncomfortable when women are funnier Humor competition in dating The role of banter and shared humor styles Why prank humor often crosses the line Accepting that you might not be the funny one Humor as a tool to diffuse conflict Different types of humor compatibility Why forcing jokes is unattractive Humor as part of flirting and connection Why being playful may matter more than being funny The pressure comedians face in dating Dating when humor is part of your identity Thank you to the best waterproof sex blanket in the market, Splash Blanket for keeping me and my guests dry and cozy ◡̈ Thank you, Beducated, for making this exploration possible. Take their quiz to start your journey: https://beducate.me/pd2610-alexa
56 min
Sexologist Alexa Andre ( @sexwithalexa ) gets in bed with writer, sex educator, and polyamorous creator Gabrielle Alexa Noel to talk about the fantasy everyone has — and the one that goes wrong the most: threesomes . From “unicorn hunting” to couple privilege, from jealousy to communication, this episode breaks down what actually makes a threesome hot and what makes it awkward, performative, or emotionally messy. Gabby and Alexa unpack why “the third is the star of the show,” why gifting a threesome is a red flag, why kissing rules are often a dealbreaker, and why straight couples may have an easier time swapping than finding a unicorn. In this episode, we cover: The biggest communication mistakes couples make Why “creating safety” changes everything Kissing rules some couples have “Couple privilege and why it matters Why the third needs to feel special How to DM a third correctly (and what NOT to say) Signs a couple isn’t actually ready Emotional labor being offloaded onto the third Why you should take the third on a date Why swapping couples may be easier than unicorn hunting Jealousy and insecurity during group sex What to do when someone feels left out Aftercare expectations and debriefs Why porn positions aren’t realistic STI prep, condom changes, and fluid bonding Toys in threesomes Single men’s best strategy for getting a threesome Why romance still matters even in casual group sex Thank you to the best waterproof sex blanket in the market, Splash Blanket for keeping me and my guests dry and cozy ◡̈
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