Published by Calling Home
Whitney Goodman is a licensed marriage and family therapist and author on a mission to help adult family members have better relationships. Each week, Whitney has conversations with influential guests and real people to help listeners find new ways of looking at old family problems.Calling Home is available every Tuesday and Thursday wherever you get your podcasts. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Listen on Apple Podcasts1 hr 15 min
If you've spent time in the estrangement conversation online, you've noticed how fast it flattens into two camps: the people who cut off and the people who got cut off. Ashley and Jon Lefrandt have lived on both sides of that line. The couple behind Leave Then Cleave joins Whitney to talk about what happened when they asked for space from one family member and ended up estranged from 40 family members. Together they explore what it looks like to hold onto your faith when your faith is the thing being used against you. In this episode, you'll learn: - How honor thy father and mother gets used to override every other thing a person believes - Why a family system escalates when one person stops complying - What words like grace, forgiveness, and reconciliation actually mean, and who tends to be the one insisting on them - How to keep a faith that has been weaponized against you Connect with Ashley and Jon Lefrandt Leave Then Cleave: https://www.leavethencleave.com/ Jon and Ashley’s Book: https://amzn.to/4fUGi4J Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
43 min
Content warning: This episode contains a description of a traumatic birth, postpartum complications, and abuse. Before the Q&A, Whitney opens with an unscripted reflection on taking a break from Instagram. She then moves into two listener questions from people who have stopped waiting for an apology and are asking what comes after you finally see your family clearly. In this episode, you'll learn: - How to handle being the only person in your family willing to talk about the past - What to do when you've accepted a parent won't change but they still expect the same closeness and access - How to think about titrating contact - Why the fantasy that a parent will soften at your lowest moment is so common Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
25 min
“He's been hard since the day he was born.” “Something in her is just off, and always has been.” “Is there something broken with my child?” Whitney traces questions and the fears beneath them to a centuries old belief that some people are simply born bad. It’s a belief that has changed costumes across religion, science, and psychology but never fully gone away. Whitney brings questions like these into the present for the parents living with a child with a mental illness, an addiction, or a disability they can't fix. In this episode, you'll learn: - How the "born bad" idea traveled across history - Why temperament is real but more complicated than you think - How to recognize these fears if you were the "problem child" so you don't hand it down Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
31 min
How do you keep giving to a relationship that isn't giving much back? How do you know when you've finally done enough? In this Q&A episode, Whitney answers two questions that arrived from very different places but land in the same spot: radical acceptance. First, a woman exhausted by in-laws who never make the drive, never offer help, and never seem to notice the effort going one direction. Second, a woman whose gone no contact with parents who keep leaving her voicemails claiming they have no idea why. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
30 min
Something goes wrong at home. A glass tips over. Someone forgot to change the laundry, unload the dishwasher. The dog escapes. Within seconds there's a full trial underway about whose fault it is. Whitney breaks down what's actually happening in families that run on blame. In this episode, you'll learn: Why blame feels like accountability but actually prevents it How the scapegoat and golden child both learn about fault The three-part anatomy of real repair What to do when you can repair and your family can’t How to stop the cycle blame with your own kids Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
28 min
Content warning: This episode discusses childhood abuse, domestic violence, racial slurs, and the death of a sibling. In this Q&A episode, Whitney reads a single letter from a woman who survived a childhood of severe violence, lost her sister at 24, and is now permanently no contact with a family system that still minimizes what happened. Whitney takes the letter in pieces and answers all three of her questions. In this episode, you'll learn: How to grieve a sibling whose life was overshadowed by abuse, without reducing them to what was done to them Why thriving after you escape is not a betrayal of the people who didn't What it means when an entire family, including the abuser, admits the violence happened and still asks you to come back Why grief and boundary-holding almost always have to happen at the same time Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
56 min
Dr. Lindsay Gibson's first book, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, gave millions of people language for what happened to them growing up. Her new book flips the lens for the people who are now raising kids of their own and are quietly terrified of passing it all down. Whitney sits down with her to talk about what actually builds emotional maturity in a child, and what to do in the moments your own immaturity shows up. In this episode, you'll learn: Why the fear of becoming your own parents is often a sign you won't What emotional maturity actually looks like at different ages, from newborn to teenager Why ruling through fear works in the short term and costs you the relationship long term How to repair with your child in a way that actually changes the pattern instead of pseudo-apologizing Why you don't have to be the perfect source of everything for your kid Connect with Dr. Lindsay Gibson Get her new book, How to Raise an Emotionally Mature Child: https://amzn.to/4fbX135 [this is an affiliate link - as an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases at not additional cost to you.] Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
33 min
In this Q&A episode, Whitney answers two questions from people trying to figure out where acceptance ends and cutting off begins. First, a woman who thought her mom was finally going to leave her father after a major blowup involving favoritism, triangulation, and infidelity, only to watch her mom stay and start calling her the difficult one instead. Second, a new mother whose parents made her postpartum period worse instead of better, and who's now wondering whether sending a birthday card is worth it after a year and a half of near silence. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
1 hr 3 min
Estranged parents often say: “We had a perfect relationship, and then something to them. Social media. A therapist. A partner. Their other parents. They were brainwashed. In this episode, Whitney takes that fear seriously and gives it an honest, research-informed answer. This episode explores: The real history of brainwashing What social media can and can’t do If therapists can implant grievances into clients How the brainwashing framework offers comfort Sources: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1M0YYHl6m_W2HeEAIa5DhM4lH6VdVmhAxTyUuEuG6qXo/edit?usp=sharing Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
35 min
One of the harder truths of estrangement is coming to terms with the fact that your parent was not who you needed them to be and in many cases is not going to become that person. In this episode’s Q&A, two questions circle that theme. First, a couple with two young children trying to integrate not one, but two sets of critical and unsupportive grandparents into their family. Second, a woman asks how to ever reach true acceptance when you’re stuck between anger and still wanting them to be different. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
29 min
Did you ever feel like you’re in a conversation where the other person is just waiting for you to stop talking while they load up something to say? You can talk to members of your family every single day and still feel completely unheard. And it works the other way too. Whitney breaks down the real difference between hearing and listening. In this episode, you’ll learn: Concrete tools for listening on both sides of a conversation How to actually listen when someone you love is hurting Why our instinct to fix or reassure often backfires How to ask for what you need when you're the one who doesn't feel heard Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
23 min
In this Q&A episode, Whitney answers two follow-up questions from her viral episode on parental curiosity. First, from a listener who wants to stay connected with an 81-year old father who has never once shown curiosity. Second, the opposite problem: a parent who, after a period of estrangement, suddenly asks a genuine follow-up question. The original episode that inspired the second question: When Parents Don't Show Curiosity About Your Life Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
30 min
Is estrangement a privilege for the middle class and the rich? Whitney pushes back on the argument that cutting off family is something only wealthy people do, not because the critique is entirely wrong, but because it's drawing the wrong conclusion. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
28 min
In this Q&A episode, Whitney answers two questions from people who love their families but are struggling with dynamics that aren't working. First, someone who spent their whole life as the family mediator and peacemaker, has done years of their own healing work, and is now asking how to stay connected to people who have never really shown curiosity about who they are. Second, a husband navigating the tension between his wife's need for distance from his parents and his own desire to maintain a relationship with them. He also asks what role, if any, his parents should have with their child. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
25 min
You’ve heard that line before. And it didn’t make things better, did it? Many apologies are not good, and often they make things worse. Whitney breaks down why some people over-apologize while others can't say "I was wrong" at all. She also gives advice for what to do when you're on either side of an apology that isn't landing. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
31 min
Whitney answers two questions from people who have stepped back from a harmful family relationship, but are stuck in what comes next. First, a wife whose husband is facing a serious health issue and wants to share medical information with his brother, knowing it will reach an estranged mother who will use it as a way back in. Second, a woman estranged from a boundary-violating mother wrestling with the pull to explain herself. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
39 min
When therapists say adult children are cutting off their parents for “normal parenting mistakes,” they're almost never specific about what that means. Whitney asked 300+ people to define a normal parenting mistake and the responses said it all. The episode explores what happens when there's no repair, no accountability, and no willingness to engage with a parenting misstep, unintentional or not, that genuinely hurt. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
37 min
Q&A episodes are back after Whitney’s maternity leave. In the first question, a woman gets into an argument with her mom and sister the day before her daughter's first birthday party and starts to recognize a pattern of always being the one to apologize. Second, a daughter-in-law asks how her husband should handle a mother-in-law who keeps inviting extra people to agreed-upon meetups. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
25 min
Describe your dad in three words. For a lot of adults, the father wound isn't about a dad who left it's about one who was physically present but emotionally absent. Whitney explores why our culture tells you this is actually not a wound at all and why this particular grief is so hard to name. Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
59 min
Not all distance in a family relationship is estrangement. Not everyone pulling away is escaping an abusive situation. In this episode, Whitney explores the gray area of quietly drifting from someone you love. Why does it happen? When does it cross into avoidance? What can reconnection look like realistically? Whitney Goodman is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and the founder of Calling Home, a membership community that helps people navigate complex family dynamics and break harmful cycles. Have a question for Whitney? Send a voice memo or email to whitney@callinghome.co Join the Family Cyclebreakers Club: https://callinghome.co Follow Whitney on Instagram | sitwithwhit Follow Whitney on YouTube | @whitneygoodmanlmft Order Whitney's book, Toxic Positivity: https://sitwithwhit.com/toxic-positivity Sign up for updates on Whitney's new book: https://cmnyyv4kpyt.typeform.com/to/PHMzjy0o This podcast is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Apple Podcasts rankings supplied by Mato Topic Intelligence Platform.
Observed July 30, 2026.
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